Posted by: Pingo | 2008/12/05

Sex mystery

Hi Guys &  Gals

I am a 36 year old male and i broke up with my girlfriend two years ago. Due to fear of HIV and other nasty stuff i resorted to masturbatiom. i was doing more than two or three times a day depending on the mood and i mostly used my bare hands.
My Problem :
i am dating a very wonderful, hot sexy and beatiful lady five years younger. After we both got tested we decided to start with sex. To my suprise, i would go for hours without ejaculation even after prolonged foreplay and with normal erection and all. We gave it a rest and a week later we were bonking again but still no ejaculation on my side. She now started to feel inadequate and told me that i dont find her attractive.

What is the cause of this because i am very confident when it comes to sex and dont suffer from perfomance anxiety or anything related to that. I think it is because of prolonged masturbation.

Can anyone help me how to overcome this because if we make love and i didnt come, then i have to finish of with the hand which is the only way i can come at this stage.

Please guys give tips to save my affair, i will do anything that is right to solve this. I also dont know what to tell the lady if she asks as to what is my problem

Thanks &  God Bless

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

I wish to first congratulate you on taking care of your sexual health (always testing for HIV with a new sexual partner)!

I believe that you have no problem at all but that your body has become conditioned to masturbation. Maybe, you can ask your partner to masturbate you and focus on non-penetrative sexual activities between you and your partner. Hopefully, once you have experimented and experienced diverse stimulation and arousal you will be able to ejaculate (try different sexual positions and the use of sex aids such as feathers, chocolate, cream, flavoured condoms, etc, with each new stimulis you will have a heightened sense of arousal which may trigger an ejaculation).

A word of advice: this may take a number of attempts to rectify! If you have a series of failures please be aware that it is not you or your partner's fault! Ejaculation is just one small facet of the sexual experience, try reconceiving sexuality and all its facets as just as important, ie: huggs, kisses, arousal, foreplay, cuddling, tasting, licking, massaging etc, by viewing sex as this, you will be a success no matter what!

Sex is a journey, enjoy every aspect of the ride!

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Louise | 2008/12/08

Could you not still have a mental block re: HIV? Maybe in your sub conscience that is preventing you from having a ' normal'  sex life...???

Reply to Louise
Posted by: Pongo | 2008/12/06

I too have been in your situation. This is simply my opinion. For the most part, when men masturbate we do it for a purpose. To get off, period. So we don' t waste anytime trying to cum. We' re on a mission to cum so we do it as fast as possible.
It' s different when were with a woman. We try to take things slow so they to can have sexual fulfillment. In my experience, the longer I take with a woman the harder it is for me to cum. It has nothing to do with how much you care about her or how hot she is. It' s just that the sexual sensitivity is gone and were ready to bang for hours.
You need to realize that your a grown man and your a sexual stud mufin now. Remember when you were 16 and it probably only took you 1-2 minutes to cum. .
Notice that when you masturbate you probably have a strong grip on your penis. Am I right? You' ll notice that your girls vagina is only so tight when you' ve been bangin for a while. Personally, I find all I need to cum after hours of banging is something tighter around my penis. To solve this I have my girl squeeze her legs together when I' m on top of her in the misisonary position. Pticure this, Your on top, she' s on her back, her legs are on the inside of both of your legs. In otherwords your stradling her. Then when she squeezes her legs in it tightens up her vagina which makes it harder for you to push it in. After maybe a minute iI' m ready to cum. If that don' t work try anal sex. That works for me to. The-|-is much tighter than the vagina.

Reply to Pongo
Posted by: Sg | 2008/12/05

I don' t think there is any doubt,your P*nis has got used to your touch/feel and you are now battling to have an orgasm by normal sex.Lay off the masturbation and things should go back to normal.

Reply to Sg

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