Posted by: Zoe | 2008/08/21


Hi CS &  all
I have a bro. and sis. of 9 &  12, the probelm is that my mom swears alot esp.when they make her angry and she would call then names that i know when i was young it really hurt and made me feel like the crappiest little thing on this planet!

My bro.has a learning problem and struggles to read and write and when he says silly things she would call him stupid, dummy and recently called him a retard...
They get told that they' re idiots, stupid ect.
He then goes on even more and tries to work on her nerves and i know its really hurts.I tell her all the time not to speak to them like this but she' s the mom and she will do just as she pleases.
My mom and dad would often argue infront/over them and this i think was the worse ever for me when i was young.

I cant tell them what to do and i cant tell them how to speak to my bro. and sis. as this only makes things worse.
I always felt like i was nothing and all this gave me a very low self esteem when i was young and i see this in them but dont know what to do or how to deal with it.They growing up and its not nice to see the lack of confidence that they have.

I have to add that although i have mentioned all this about my mom she does do everything she can fro them and also did for me when i was young,she gives the time,listens and provides them with everything they need its almost asif she cannot help breaking them down at the same time.
Pls hlep

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Doesn'tt your dad worry about how badly and abusively she talks to their children ? Can't you persuade him that this is bad for them, perhaps emphasizing how much you appreciate the better way he talks to each of you. And as for mom, you seem to be saying that she looks after them very well apart from these occasional outbursts. Maybe if you concentrated for a time on congratulating her on what she does RIGHT, the bad spells would diminish ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: EL | 2008/08/21

Whatever you tell your kids they are, they will be!

Reply to EL

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