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Question
Posted by: Debrah | 2003/03/17

Responsibilities

Hi,
I know one can't change another person and this is not what I'm trying to achieve. I love my boyfriend very much but he's got a problem with taking on responsibilities. All that happens in the end is that I get stuck with his responsibilities and that causes a lot friction between us. When I say responsibilities I don't mean big things, I mean every day, basic things, like checking if all your payments go through, paying bills, doing a bit of cleaning around the house etc. How do I go about convincing him that he should make this one of his priorities without letting him think I'm just forever moaning and groaning. I'm tired of being unhappy because I get upset about all these little things.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Debrah, those things which you call "responsibilities" are the meat and potatoes of adult existence, and not simply "little things", A guy who sees them as little things that can be neglected, or just left to someone else to deal with, hasn't finished growing up yet, and may not be the best choice of partners for a stable relationship. Maybe he lets such things slide when he has a rescuer and enabler around to make it painless to neglect these duties, and who always picks up all the pieces for him ?

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