Our expert says:
One does expect a married person to think more of his partner and not only of himself. But a parent living with you so often causes problems, especially of the sort you describe. She needs to think that if she were not there, she wouldn't know of any squabbles, and would not be able to intervene, and yet you would still have survived.
Its good to look after your mom, though her happiness, and even to some extent her comfort, is her own responsibility - you can trynto avoid making her unhappy, but happiness she needs to find for herself, as always in life.
Why not consider asking your husband ( NOT mom ! ) to join you in a few sessions of couples counselling, to coordinate views of where you are and where you want to go together ?
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