Our expert says:
Aah, the French counsellor issue ! It's far from "totally wrong" to enjoy having someone on your side at last ! Anyone would appreciate that. But it is a more sophisticated judgement to realize that bias, rather than an appreciation of the greater degree of rightness of one partner compared to another, can hamper therapy.
Sounds like he is running away from the problem, choosing not to face any real aspects of it. He's overlooking the fact that the first thing he'll unavoidably unpack when he reaches his overseas new job, is his bundle of heartaches and unresolved issues ; and he'll probably have less support and resources there, to deal with it.
But your priority must be to look after yourself. NO to the botle. See a srink and conquer that fear of the dark --- he may have facilitated your earlier progress, but YOU made that progress, and can do it, and more, again. He was partly a coach, you it was who were the victor and can be again. Don't allow yourself to indulge in another downfall, as a negative memorial to his loss --- show him, as he will learn in time, how successful you can be on your own, with apporpirtae aid for a time from a local shrink, just for yourself.
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