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Question
Posted by: Inc | 2004/11/02

Reality Check

I'm looking for opinions please...

Are there men who could settle down with someone like me... divorced mother of 3 with the 'germ'? Or am I kidding myself that I will someday meet someone?

Please give me honest opinions?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Surely there are. Isn't the problem finding and meeting them, rather than the actual existence of the species ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/11/03

Hey Inc.,

My honest truthful opinion is yes.

My gf is not divorced, nor has she had kids yet, but she been abused & we're patiently waiting for the results.

But the amazing thing to me is that thru all this, she is the same person & that's who I want to be with. She doesn't know this & is already trying to push me away, but my resolve is that she came into my life & I saw myself having another chance at being happy again, & I have realised that no matter what we go through, I am there for her, in anyway she wants me.

See, my opinion is that of-course you will get those guys that are scared off by your condition. Really speaking you can't blame then can you. They are entitled to that behaviour coz of their ignorance. But there are those guys that really wanna connect on an emotional level & that to me is way more important.

I once heard that you should marry someone you enjoy talking with, coz when everything else is gone, you will have the conversations to get you thru everything else...

Just my 2 cents worth.

Take care,
Shaun

Reply to Shaun
Posted by: REALITY | 2004/11/03

hi. every ones given u great advise. but i would say be pro-active. there are guys out there in your position. so try an join some support groups and maybe u will find the male version of u. sorry, i know the way i said it, it sounds terrible...but u get what i'm trying to say. be positive...oops here i put my foot in it again. again u know what i mean :)

Reply to REALITY
Posted by: reality | 2004/11/03

hi. every ones given u great advise. but i would say be pro-active. there are guys out there in your position. so try an join some support groups and maybe u will find the male version of u. sorry, i know the way i said it, it sounds terrible...but u get what i'm trying to say. be positive...oops here i put my foot in it again. again u know what i mean :)

Reply to reality
Posted by: Kernel | 2004/11/03

Hi Inc

Maybe you should shift your focus slightly - instead of looking for a partner, look at how you could improve the lifes of yourself and your kids.

You don't really need a man in order to enrich and enjoy your life - that should not be the focus. Once you are content and happy with yourself, you will find that men will show more interest in you and you may even meet the partner you are looking for now - but, as I said, that should not be your main goal, otherwise your whole life would be miserable until you have met that person, which could be a long time.

Reply to Kernel
Posted by: Me | 2004/11/02

Germ = HIV?

Reply to Me
Posted by: Jenna | 2004/11/02

Inc,

Don't give my hope my friend. You are a wonderful person, and your partner is waiting out there for you. Maybe it will take some time, this society we live in has alot of narrow minded people. He is out there, and he is probably looking for someone like you. Sorry to say this, but your psychiatrist should be shot, he/she has no right telling you what your future holds. Don't listen to that nonsense. You have been strong all this time, don't give up now.

Good bless

Reply to Jenna
Posted by: BC | 2004/11/02

We cant tell you the answer as we dont know either, but u must not give up your dreams and believes, I think your psychiatrist is worried that if you put too much hope into it, it will hurt you.
Thats all I can say, dont give up, but dont depend on it so much.
Good luck

Reply to BC
Posted by: PARIS | 2004/11/02

Excuse my ignorance but what is the germ?

PARIS
XXX

Reply to PARIS
Posted by: Inc | 2004/11/02

Thank you... I just needed to know that I am not holding onto a false hope... My psychiatrist told me that there is no man that will accept someone in my position and that I should forget about ever meeting someone....
I am currently not looking for anyone... still licking my wounds from the last episode... but I was wondering if I should give up my dreams and be realistic.

Reply to Inc
Posted by: TW | 2004/11/02

Of course, if its in Gods plan for you life ..I think a BIG yes...
like said above dont look for love, move on with your life and become a happy confident woman(very attractive quality to men - as they dont want a woman who is all clingy)

You need to start doing things that will build you up (like going to church and joining a cell group perhaps meet people who are in the same place as you are)

Its not so much that you have children its more about who you are as a person that they will be attracted to...
All the best
God bless

Reply to TW
Posted by: Beyond Tired | 2004/11/02

Hi Inc,
There is someone out there for all of us it just sometimes takes longer than we want or expect. Don't give up on yourself, you are a special and wonderful person, whether you have 3 kids and the "germ", so what, nobody is perfect and nobody can expect someone else to be perfect.
Don't give up on finding that special someone, he is out there, but be patient.
Take Care.

Reply to Beyond Tired
Posted by: JM | 2004/11/02

If there is someone out there that's the one, then he will accept you for what your are and not for what you have.

Don't think about it, and the moment when you least expect it, it will happen. Don't look for love, let love find you!

Reply to JM
Posted by: Q | 2004/11/02

GERM??

Reply to Q

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