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Question
Posted by: Stef | 2008/05/22

Re: What's wrong with me

Out of sheer desperateness husband was assessed for sleep aphnea as well as other sleep disorders. Nothing was found to be wrong with him. He was overweight, but after a hectic diet, he's now near his goal weight. We eat healthy and he plays gholf and gyms every now and then.

His father died when he was a young teenager, so his mom was left to care for the children. She doesnt think that there's anything wrong with him or his behaviour. (Even if she did, she would never admit it, nor would any of his sister or his brother).

The thing is he was never like this. It started while I was pregnant and is only getting worse. Even if I was sick the day, he'll still not help with our son. It's as if he can't believe that I'm actually sick.

We barely have sex. Maybe once every 2 months. He says it's nomal to have sex this "often" and can't believe that a woman has needs to. When we do have sex, he's finished within 2 minutes and it's actually "wham, bam, thank you mam" and then he goes to sleep.

I'm thinking of divorcing him - but I still love him!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

OK, family in denial, or not prepared to criticise at all. Sounds as though you love the guy you met ( who didn't behave like this ) but can't love his current selfish behaviour. One can understand why you might consider divorce. Is a trial separation feasible, to face him with the likely consequences of continuing to behave like this ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Ness | 2008/05/22

Shame sweets I'm really sorry to hear that. I know how hard it is cause even to this day my daughter says things like "remember when you used to sleep all the time" I feel so bad, like I scared her for life but then I have explained that I was sick and thats behind me now.

He has to want to change and while everyone is "enabling" him to stay the same (his family) he has no need to.

Oh dear, not good

Reply to Ness
Posted by: Stef | 2008/05/22

It was a planned pregnancy - we tried for nearly 5 years to fall pregnant and eventually did with the help of a fertility specialist.

He gets a B12 injection regularly, so unfortunaty it isn't that.

I think it might just be habit :-(

Reply to Stef
Posted by: Ness | 2008/05/22

I know this probably sounds stupid and you have most likely tried it already. But I used to sleep alot... and I mean alot. I was not depressed or anything just always tired. My doctor put me on Iron and now all is perfect. Perhaps he need a good B12 injection or something.

Sleeping is also a habbit. The more you sleep the more you want to sleep. Sorry I have no idea what else to say

Good luck

Reply to Ness
Posted by: S@m | 2008/05/22

You say that it started while you pregnant, was it a planned pregnancy? Did hubby want to have kids? Perhaps he did not want children or was not ready to have children yet. Maybe he just wanted to have you to himself and feels that the baby is in the way. Just a thought!

Reply to S@m

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