Posted by: JOLA | 2004/11/18

RE: RE: separation anxiety

I do admit that I am slightly over protective, but my daughter is not dictating to me, she fears that I will leave her and not come back, I have the same scenario everyday when I leave for work! My main concern is how do you find a decent creche? What do you look for?

I am not trying to keep her away from the world, the way I was kept, all i want is a creche where my child can grow to her full potential. All the creche's i have been to so far i not been upto scratch.

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Our expert says:
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The trouble can be that if instead of re-assuring her that she won't be left, if one puts in place too many precautions, one risks confirming her fears, and the message that, but for the precautions she has asked for, she would indeed be deserted. She needs to learn --- as do all youngsters, that even when you go to creche, mom is still mom and is still there, even when mom isn't in sight. Mona's sugestions about checking out a creche sound excellent, too.
And it's interesing that you comment " the way I was kept ( away from the world)" --- it may be that your unaware discomfort with the separation could be communicating themselves to her. Maybe you can, ( unless you choose to enlist the help of a child psychologist ) try to help her get used to your absences, by arranging for more,, but minor, and gradually lengthening absences, so she can learn that mom goes and comes back !
Good luck in the creche hunt !

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Our users say:
Posted by: JOLA | 2004/11/18

Thank you for the advise, i will surely be following it!

Reply to JOLA
Posted by: Mona | 2004/11/18

I'm very happy with the creche my daughter goes to, you can judge it on the state of the kids when you unexpectedly rock up in the middle of the day, and also the personalities of the teachers. They must really love kids, and not just be a creche teacher cos they couldnt find anything else. Also, when you find a creche that you like, stop there in the evening when the parents are fetching their kids, ask a few of them their opinion about the creche.

Reply to Mona

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