Our expert says:
You surely did the best you could, as a parent, and never had the remotest intention of contributing in any way to your kid becoming like this. I doubt that you went greatly wrong, and apologising for it does't really help, as you'e discovered. He absolutely HAS to learn to take responsibility for himself and to accept the inevitable or at least likely results of the choices he makes and the things he does.
Good luck, and keep in touch with the forum and let us know how things work out.
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