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Question
Posted by: Nerves | 2008/05/21

Re: Help Please

Hi All,

Maybe some of you can shed some light on this subject... I have a date on Friday night where the guy is coming to my house to have supper with myself and the parents. This is the first time that i will be meeting him and him me. We have exchanged many pictures and well things look wonderful. My parents say everything is fine and well. I have not taken anybody home before to meet the parents and this will be the first guy that sits down and has supper with us. I am white he is indian and the parents know this. But my question is how do i not get pulled up in the tension if any and how do i treat this wonderful guy in my house with my two parents and grandmother around..

Your advice would really help please..

I am 27.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I agree with Maria, it seems a very odd decision to plan your very first meeting together to take place at the very same time as his first meeting with your parents. Can't you even plan to meet with him on Thursday evening, even for some coffee somewhere, just to get to know each other a bit, first ? It sounds nice that he wants to meet your parents, maybe to re-assure himself that they're comfortable with this relationship --- but was he actually insisting that this be the very first time he'd meet you, too ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Nerves | 2008/05/21

Hi Cybershrink,

Yes this would be our very first meeting together. The man feels that it would be the best so that we can get the parents blessing..

Reply to Nerves
Posted by: Nerves | 2008/05/21

Hi Maria,

Thank you very much for the advice. I have quite a few topics and i know my mom will keep the conversation going so i am sure to think of something... I will try and treat him as well as i possibly can. I will definitely let you know how it goes Maria..

Thanks

Reply to Nerves
Posted by: Maria | 2008/05/21

Oh well, make the best of it then! Try to treat him like a friend rather than focussing on the boyfriend aspect, as you don't want him to feel that everybody is evaluating his marriage potential. (Parents and grandparents do that...) Have you been emailing each other? Then go back through the messages and try to pick up some topics that you can use to keep conversation going if necessary. It will be especially helpful if there is something that your friend may have in common with one of your parents, like e.g. hobby.

Good luck, and please let us know how it went.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Nerves | 2008/05/21

Hi Maria,

Actually i did suggest going somewhere else but although it is at night it is not such a bad idea. And the best part about it all is this wonderful man of mine suggested that we have dinner with the parents at home... He really wants to meet them...

Can you please explain that to me doll..

Reply to Nerves
Posted by: Maria | 2008/05/21

Why did you decide to have your first meeting at home with your parents? It's brilliant from a safety point of view but a first meeting is always awkward and having parents and a grandmother there will not make it easier! Can't you meet him somewhere for lunch on your own first?

Reply to Maria

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