Our expert says:
Unfortunately experiences like this are far too common. Its all too tempting at the time to try to deny the reality of the ugly things that happened, and for a time it often seems to have worked. But like putting a mattress over a smouldering fire, bits of smoke escape from time to time, and then the mattress is inclined to collapse after a while, letting the fire flare up.
WHY ME ? is an irresistable question, even though strictly illogical - its not as if there was a list somewhere of people who were due to be raped, and then one day your name reached to top mof the list ; or that there were any sort of logical reasons why horrible things happen to good people. Sometimes they happen at random ; but we really don't like to think that ; sometimes our niceness leads us into feeling guilty, and somehow responsible for what was always the utter responsibility and "fault" of the perpatrator(s).
WHat's needed isn't so much to forget what happened, but to remove its fangs, to remove its power to disturb you, and to allow it to fade back into your personal history without distorting your present or future.
The person to see would be a skilled psychologist o counsellor, preferably someone with longer experience, and who doesn't exclsuively deal with this particular type of problem, so they will better be able to deal with it broadly and in context. You will, really, be able to process this and put it behind you, as you so much deserve to be able to do
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