Posted by: Troubled | 2008/10/31

&quot Boyfriend" 

I went through a very difficult divorce and was supported emotionaly by a wonderful man. Been divorced now for nearly 9 months and am totaly over my ex. I think the divorce procedure was only a formality because i' ve been emotionally disconnected from my ex about two years now. Had endured cheating and abuse and tried everything to make the marraige of 8 years work but could' nt. This friend has a girlfriend for the past 10 years now. He was really there in my darkest hour and really my pillar of strenght. During the months we get to know each other really well and developed feelings for one another. He plans of leaving his girlfriend and declared his love for me. We know each other for quite a few years and he always said he admired me how I tried to save my marriage and the way I am and how I handled my situation. I did not divorce my husband for him. He just needs time to gradually break up with his girlfriend. I' m not in any hurry to get married or anything but would also not want to be taken for granted. Will he ever break up with his girlfriend? He told me of his intensions a few months ago but nothing happend thus far. He do spends time with her when he is not working. My question is, how do you gradually break up with someone. It' s not that there are any children or shared property involved.

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Our expert says:
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YEs, the length of time it takes to get over a divorce may indeed depend on how long the emotional detaching has been taking place. We can't tell you whether this new guy will or won't break up with his gf. ME is right, to draw your attention to how you don't seem to think of the hurt that will attach to the gf.

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Our users say:
Posted by: mandy | 2008/11/09

You are out of your mind

Reply to mandy
Posted by: ME | 2008/10/31

how would you feel if you were in his girlfriend' shoes?. Do you really wanna build your happiness out of somebody' s hurt?.
I this guy having some problems with her girlfriend? If not, do you think he' ll just leave her like that and be with you? What if he does the same thing to you one of those days?, have feelings for someone else and dump you like he' s going to do with his gilfriend now?
and lastly but bot least, If I heard you right, yo' ve been divorced for only 9 months, don' t you think its still too early to commit yourself to a serious relationship again?

Reply to ME

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