Our expert says:
Isn't it time for a calm discussion between you about the finances and other aspects of the plan of moving towards mariage and being able to afford it ? Not a confrontation about whether or not, but an exploration about what you each want, and how to get there from here, and at roughly what pace it might be possible.
Apparently you have two other children by another father o fathers ? Can hey not ( and shouldnt they ) support their children ? Can't you go to the maintenance court to get them required to do so ?
A fully independent woman who can entirely aford to support herself and her children, can afford to make the decision to have children largely on her own ( though she should always take into account the child's prospects and the ability to care properly for the child long-term ). But otherwise, one really should try very hard to avoid having any children until one can fully afford to care for them until they are adults, whether doing so from on's own earnings, or because one is in a stable and long-term relationship with someone who can share those tasks and expenses.
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