Our expert says:
What puzzles me a bit is the thought --- is this new ? Or is this typical of the guy you married and chose to have children withy ? If it's new, maybe he's ill and needs a good expert assessment. If not, then the issue would be more one of whether he might be re-educated if, maybe with the aid of a good counsellor for yourself, he can be prodded into changing. It sounds as if he's a genius at assive-aggressive techniques, knowing that id he postpones and then messes up on a chore, very capable you will step in and do the job for him. Isn't there somewhere within reach, a class in home maintenance and repairs you could enrol him in ? Couldn't you find ways to make him feel good and encouraged about his attempts, feeble thopugh some of them might sem, and prod him into finishing the jobs, with you hlping and cencouraging and applauding, rather than taking over ? Maybe if, as you control the budget, he had to forego some of his pleasures so you could save up to hire a handiman, he might become more motivated to become handier himself ?
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