Posted by: Hopeless | 2005/07/01

Psychiatrist next?<br><br>Psychiatrist or not?

Hi CS;

Last year I started seeing a psychologist, mainly because I felt I needed help with social anxiety. (I am divorced, but have no friends or boyfriend and I find myself unable to reach out to people or put myself out there, I just can't). So the result is that I live a very isolated existence, just work, home and my daughter. And it really is a lonely hell. My sessions with the psych were beneficial; I have since managed to start doing things like joining a hiking club which I never thought myself capable before. However, even in group activities I seem to keep myself away from others; I make no lasting contacts or form any friendships etc. I would for instance go on a hike, enjoy it tremendously and then go home without really having made contact with any of the others in the group. So the lonely hell continues.

I stopped going to the psych after about 3 months, no fault of his. I just felt I was getting nowhere, although he helped me gain a lot of insight into the issues that I have re undiminished anger and resentment towards my ex-husband (after 5 years; time is no healer here!), excessive fear of rejection, inability to see myself in a positive light or accept myself, issues with my father, the list goes on and on.

Although I had terminated the sessions because Ifelt a lack of progress, I wasn't doing too badly until about 2 months ago. Up till then I had been very conscious of healthy living, eating right, exercising, keeping my weight under control etc. Then suddenly it all collapsed; I started eating uncontrolably (up to four slabs of chocolate a day sometimes, enough to make you shudder), stopped exercising, started picking up weight and just feeling listless, no energy or motivation. I used to get up at 5 in the morning, go for a 2-hour walk, clean the house, write letters and do all kinds of things.Suddenly all my interest in anything was gone; I now easily sleep until 10 on a Saturday morning and stille feel unable to get up or do anything.

Loneliness is such a burden for me, I often think about ending it all. Although I never will, I have a young daughter to consider. But my existence is soooo pointless, I wonder why I was even born? I am now considering going to a psychiatrist, but after my failure with the psychologist, will there really be any point to that? Am I just grasping at straws now because I feel so desperate? And must one be referred by a GP, or can one simply make an appointment directly with a psychiatrist? I don't know whether I am just trying to run blindly in a direction again hoping for a miracle...what do you think? (Sorry about the long ramble...)

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like you made useful achievements with the help of that psychologist ; maybe seeing another would enable you to complete the necessary work and become comfortable making real friendships with other people and getting involved in even more hobbies and activities with others. Maybe some meication in addition to the psychotherapy could help, too, as there could well be a chemical depression AS WELl as the uncomfortable habits you need to unform

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Spooky | 2005/07/01

I was in a psychiatric clinic for two weeks once where I met someone who fits your description exactly.
I have never felt such heartfelt sympathy and affection for someone like I had felt for this poor lady.
I would never make a good shrink because I would simply get too emotionally involved with patients.
Putting this poor soul in a place with other psychotic and depressed people was definitely not the answer.
Personally I believe it is a great flaw in the hospitalisation practices of mentally ill people. All the patients just had one thing in mind, to get the hell out of there!
I wish I could afford to establish a centre where I could assist with the uplifting of the mental status of people like you where patients are entertained and taken out on socials and encouraged to participate in fun physical activities, etc, etc, etc….. I have learnt that everyone, no matter who, has something great and unique to offer to society. Something that they can feel pound of giving and sharing with others. It simply takes the right encouragement which, admittedly can also only probably be achieved under favourable and conducive circumstances.
Of course there must also be an effort from within to overcome distrust, bashfulness and phobias in an attempt to achieve a normal and healthy level of self-esteem and confidence again – medication alone will not achieve this without the right mindset and neither will continued motivation achieve this if there is a chemical unbalance.
I. E. You need to see a psychiatrist AND a psychologist – one without the other in your case, is a futile exercise, as you have found out – obviously no fault of yours.
You are evidently severely depressed as a result of a chemical unbalance and unfortunate past circumstances and therefore most definitely need to see a psychiatrist (and psychologist) as soon as possible.
Sorry I have to rush off - I’d like to have spoken to you a little longer.
God Bless and Much Love

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