Posted by: Justin | 2009/02/28

problems with my life is in hell


recently my gf and i have had terrible she tells me that she needs space and time to think.what does this mean? when i say to her i love u i love you alot,she doesnt answer me she remains silent and says justin im sorry and when i ask her do you love me ? she tells me i dont know.i ask her are we still going out? and she replys i dont know but on somedays she will say i love u 2 .i dont know what to do,plz help me its affecting my life

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Our expert says:
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Hi Justin,

as uncomfortable as it feels sometimes giving the person some space is the only thing that will help them think through what has happened and where they are at with the relationship. You may need to gain some clarification about what she means by space. Sometimes people say this when they don't have the guts to tell someone its over, or it may be that she genuinely needs time to think.

There are times when although we want instant answers to relieve our anxiety we have to allow the space to continue the relationship - if you push too much for an answer yo may get the answer you dont want because she feels so pressured.

Ultimately you cannot make up her mind for her, you can only state how you feel and let her work out what she feels too.

I hope things work out for you Justin

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2009/03/02

I may not give u the advice u looking for but I can use myself to give u a better understanding. All couples will have their fights, some are bad, some extreme &  some just are like nothing. When ur gf says she wants time it could mean alot of things, I as a girl say that to my bf only when we fight coz he irritates me &  i like my space to be alone. On ur gf' s case i dont know if she means it in the same way. I have said to my bf times b4 that i dont know if i love him but that depends what we fight about &  sometimes i say things i dont mean but say it out of anger but i later apologize.
U need to talk to her and discuss where url have gone wrong. Without communication ur relationship wont go a long way. U need to ask her whats on her mind &  what type of relationship is she looking for coz if she wants a not so serious relationship &  u do then u might have to reconsider the girl u have chosen. Its hard but at the end of the day if two people dont feel the same way its only gonna lead to hurt &  pain so U need to talk &  she needs to be open with u &  stop giving u the ' i dont know' z"  all the best i hope it works out

Reply to anon
Posted by: Suzette | 2009/03/02

Your gf is right,

Reply to Suzette

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