Our expert says:
Firstly, a hobby horse of mine, as a major expert in that field. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS ( unless an ambulance-man drops the stretcher AFTER fetching you from the acciedent ) - what can arise after exposure to personal life-threatening stress, is PTSD, Post-Traumatic STress Disorder - a DISORDER that follows after ( post ) traumatic stress.
OK, a very nasty experience for you all, dealing with your child's serious illness.
When people compliment us on "how marvellous" we are in a crisis, they're usually actually expressing their relief that (a) its not their crisis, and (b) hoping they won't be asked to help.
And it is typical that when under severe stress, we "disociate", or partially disconnect our emotions so as to be better able to cope with the immediate essentials.
Pleased to hear she has been improving. I have friends BOTH of whose children had similar awful periods of infections and hospitalizations in their early months, and have since become strong and healthy.
Your child, fortunately is likey both to grow strong and well, and she will probably NOT be adversely affected psychologically by these experiences. For a variety of reasons, including that our nervous system's wiring takes longer to fully develop than people expect - we usually have no memories of events this young in life, and thus can have no lasting ill-effects from them in the way one might expect if something analogous happened later in life.
At such a young age, your child had no expectations of what moms or nurses did, and could not have formed any opinion about what happened.
I think now it is your own state of health, including mental health, which deserves proper attention. You should if possible see a good local psychiatrist for a full assessment, and a discussion of diagnosis and of treatment options. It sounds as though you may well ( and very understandably ) have developed a depression and/or anxiety, which would respond well to treatment.
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