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Question
Posted by: 123 | 2008/07/18

PORN

MY HUSBAND SEEMS TO BE ADDICTED TO PORN. HE BUYS ADULT MOVIES. THESE RANGE FROM TEEN SEX TO SEX WITH ANIMALS. HE IS SELF EMPLOYED AND WHEN NOT WORKING HE IS SITTING HOME WATCHING THESE.
I FEEL DISGUSTED JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS. WE ARE BOTH IN EARLY 40s WITH TEEN KIDS.
HOW DO I APPROACH HIM

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Such an excessive interest in ANYTHING on DVD ( even if it was Disney cartoons ) would be a bad idea for someone self-employed, as it would reduce the amount of time spent on doing and developing whatever his self-employed work is. And his interest in more dubious material is a reasonable concern in a family with teenage kids ( and family pets !)
I agree with Anon#2 that this is primarily about bad habits, not specifically sexual. Consider, as suggested, developing more shared family activities, maybe encourage a concentration on how much work he has or hasn't got done within a day ( like a teenager and homework issues ) and consider some marriage counselling sessions to deal with the broader issues within your relationship with him.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Anon#2 | 2008/07/18

This is definitely not a sexual issue - it' s about bad habits, no self-discipline and a whole lot of disrespect. He could as easily be gambling or drinking in his spare time (which he has too much of). Point out to him, that no matter how careful he is, the children WILL find this cruddy stuff - he is to get it out of the home.

And maybe find some activity that you both enjoy - hiking, golf, bridge, tennis, chess, dancing, camping, fishing, watching live motor racing - anything, and start doing this as a couple and/or as a family. Don' t attach the activity to the porn issue - keep it as a seperate and pleasurable thing to be looked forward to.

Reply to Anon#2
Posted by: SR | 2008/07/18

How did it come about that you allowed it in the first place?

Reply to SR
Posted by: CV | 2008/07/18

Something wrong in your bedroom girl.

Reply to CV

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