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Posted by: Empty | 2007/06/05

Pointless existence - please help!!!!!!!

Two and a half months ago my fiance left me for someone else, we were supposed to get married in August. Anyway, to cut a long story short I ended up in a psychiatric hospital because I was suicidal and suffering from major depression. I spent 2 weeks in hospital and came out having to face the world again. It took a bit of adjustment but I managed to start feeling like I was back on track and there was hope in the world for me.<br><br>I have been in therapy regularly for the past two and half months and I have also been taking my medication.<br><br>The problem is that now I'm again starting to feel like there is no point to my life. It's the same old thing everyday. I have many hobbies and activities that I'm involved in and they have, up until now, brought me a lot of joy. In the past 2 weeks these things don't bring me any joy anymore. When I am around people I am even more lonely than I am when I'm by myself.<br><br>I feel like someone who is just going through the motions. I've tried everything to get out of this but nothing works anymore. Each day gets worse instead of better and I'm starting to think about suicide a lot more regularly again.<br><br>Please help!!!!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hello E ; sorry to hear of this --- very sad, but maybe if your fiancee was capable of this degree of cruelty, it was better to discover this before rather than after the marriage. Sounds like you intitially were responding well and wisely to therapy and medication, but that now you are for some reason experiencing a dip in mood --- maybe its the approach of the date of the originally planned wedding that is casting a gloomy shadow ? Its typical of a depression that while it's around it removes from you the pleasure you usually get from whatever pleases you. The return of suicidal thoughts is more sinister --- you really need to discuss this in detail with your therapist ( I hope he / she is usuing the highly efective Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy methods which would be so very useful here. You will find good things to fill that empty space, especially after August. Completion is a larger task, and takes all of us a bit longer than that, but is achievable, especially by someone with your intelligence and sincerity

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: kittu | 2007/06/05

Heh please dont feel lonely, u know as i said i have been thru a similar situation. The fact is that my father expired and a week later my boyfren left me to marry someone else.
i was completely devasted but i decided to take a lesson from all these experiences & made myself more stronger. I am loner too n dont discuss all this with my frens n family as well but i have a very strong self esteem n control over my emotions which gives me immense power to take charge of my life.
Feeling lonely is natural but do not sulk over this, coz these days are goin to pass by.

Reply to kittu
Posted by: 2BEME | 2007/06/05

Hi Empty
I wish i could wave a wand and take all that hurt away - i wish i could say something that will make it better. the only thing i would like to give you is a few words of wisdom which i read just today and hope that somewhere and somehow this will stick and help you
1) Becareful of your thoughts - your life is sahped by our thoughts.
2) if you look back too often you wont be able to see ahead
3) Just because no one has beensmart enough to figure out that you are the best - doesnt stop you from being the best you can be
4) Dont let someone become a priority in your life when you are just an option in theirs.
5) We make them cry who care for us, we cry for those who never care for us and we care for those who will never cry for us - this is life as strange as it may be - you can decide and make the change in your life now.
So empty please remember that in order to see that rainbow clearly we have to go through the storm - the whole storm and it is not fun.
Hang in there and let these moments pass because it is not really time that heals it is what we do with our time that allows the healing process to continue


Reply to 2BEME
Posted by: Lonely | 2007/06/05

Thank you Kittu for your reply.

I don't want to be with my ex anymore. I have realised that he actually did me a favour by leaving. He is not a very nice person and I was the last person to see this. I don't miss him at all and am glad that things ended before we got married.
The problem is that I'm so lonely and miserable, there is a big empty space in my life and nothing seems able to fill it and make me complete.

Reply to Lonely
Posted by: kittu | 2007/06/05

Hi dear,
I can completly understand wot ur goin thru, coz i have been thru a similar situation a month ago.
You need to understand that you are the only one who understands yourself better and no one can hurt u without ur permission.
Tell me how many relations in your life have been successful??
Only few whom u can call ur own? and ofcourse ur family but not every one is lucky enuf to have a understanding one.
when life is so short, why do u need to spent ur days regretting on sumthing which didnt turn out wot was not meant to be anyways
Consider urself lucky that ur fiance did this before lawfully commiting to you. May be god didnt want u to feel more depressed so he is warding off all the bad happenings from ur life before u begin a new journey of marriage.
take care dear.

Reply to kittu

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