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Question
Posted by: mimi | 2004/11/11

plse give your opinion

hi doc
married for 7 years . currently seeing a marraige counsellor , my husand is a problem drinking , he does not think he has a problem , the dr has seen me for 2sessions alone , and my hb went to see him yesterday , when I asked my hb how did it go he told me that the dr said that the main problem lays with me , I could not believe it (I did smell booze in his breath , my hb did admit that he had a drink) , I was so hurt and told my hb that I will phone the dr and ask him how could he ever say that , then my hb said o.k he is lying , it is himself that thinks so , because I keep on running to my family with our problems. That is true I will not argue , the reason however is that after every 4rth or so realy bad drinking spree (were he will necglet me and kids or swear at me ) I will feel I can not any more , then I will pick up the phone for support , my family has never ever called him bad names ,do u think this marraige will ever work , my hb is acting so childish , and he told to my face that he will never stop drinking ever , but promises that he will not ever get to that passing out stage , it feels as if I can pick the phone and call a divorce layer , I left a massege to the consellor to phone me back asap to tell him how my husband only tells half off stories to suit him and plain and simple lies ! I am tired of this manupalitive , stone trowing , blaming marraige , is there anything more I can do ?

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Our expert says:
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It's amost part of the definition of a problem drinker that they don't think they have a problem. After a session with each of you on your own, if this is any sort of competent marriage counsellor, he needs to see you both together, to discuss exactly the sort of matters you raise in your message.

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