Our expert says:
Well, if you agreed to marry him on the basis of him being and remaining clean and being beyond his drug problem, he has apparently breached the agreement, and there is no need for you to go ahead with the wedding. You are right to be afraid --- marrying an active crack addict is never ever a good idea. And of course, starting a family is out of the question until he is consistently clean. You know too, that him merely promising now that it won't happen again is almost meaningless --- Surely he promised you "never agin" previously ? At least postpone the wedding ( perhaps it can be said to be on the grounds of some health problems ) and see him get into a rehab program and longer-term counselling with a good shrink. Good intentions alone are always essential, but never enough.
When you later add that this has hapened every 3 months for the last year, you know that he isn't really meaningfully intending to stop this drug abuse. And what on earth is his argument ? He says a counsellor told him the cravings only come back every 3 months --- so his great plan is to go on a drug binge every 3 months ? Having read the further details you supplied in your second message, I'd say call the weding off and move sadly on. If later in life he has been siccessully clear for some years, and you should happen to meet again, well, maybe you could be friends.
Love is not enough. Someone who gets in debt to violent dealers, and blows all the month's money every couple of months, can be nobody's husband and nobody's father --- he is married already, to the crack. You deserve much, much more than he can give.
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