Posted by: Myburgh | 2008/02/01

Please Help

I lost my job of 8 years (I was a manager) because of one mistake I made. It was either take your pension and go or get a hearing and lose everything. I've been sitting at home since December looking for work.
It has been an absolute nightmare. I go to two to three interviews daily and I'm just not successful. I think there is something wrong with me. I feel so useless because I can't even get a job anywhere. Everytime I go for an interview, I feel good about it afterwards. But then I get the call-back to say that I wasn't good enough, or it is a BEE position, excuses,excuses...
My position has started to take a toll on my marriage and I don't know where the money is going to come from to help provide for my family.
I am down in the dumps and I feel that if I don't get work soon, I will commit suicide. I just can't handle this stress any longer. I've tried it once before a few years back and just ended up hurting myself.
But I cannot accept that I've thrown my life and career away and think that would be the better way out.

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Our expert says:
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What a horrible experience ! And its awful when employers put that sort of pressure on anyone. Did you consult a good labour lawyer, or arbitration service, or the Dept of Labour for advice about your rights in that situation ? THis can be very disturbing and can, if you allow it to, cause you to lose confidence in yourself. But if that was your first serious mistake in 8 years, you must be a very capable guy in general. Check out the counselling / psychiatric services at your nearest major provincial hospital or medical school, and see someone for a full assessment and at least some counselling to help you cope as you work your way through this situation. I understand that it can indeed feel hopeless at times, but your family are and will always be, better off with your around than otherwise.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Been there | 2008/02/04

Please hang in there. It is abosolutely soul destroying I know. but realise that it may take a few months. You are doing the best you can and that is going for interviews and getting your CV out. Firstly speak to your bank and see if you can freeze you bond payments. If you have a good track record they will help. Take control over the little things you can and you will start feeling better. Sit and think of ways to tighten the belt a bit at home - healthy veg meals e.g. You are NOT a loser. Even if a mistake was made, so what, we all make mistakes, maybe you are not fully aware of your rights as doc says so phone and find out. When you are at the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and HANG ON !

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