Our expert says:
What a very horrible episode. He can't expect you to just overlook this and move on directly.Was he drunk at the time ? ( Not an excuse, it never is, but it might help explain why this happened at this time - though presumably he has been drunk before, and you speak as though this is the first and only time something like this has happened.
Its the psychological bruising that is even more important than the physical bruising.
If he wants to show genuine regret ( rather than manipulative mumbling of "Im sorry" ) then he should agree to see a good local psychologist for a thorough assessment of what happened and why ( with you sharing at least part of the session, as he apparently doesn't ( as is indeed rather often the case ) fully recall all that happened ). And he should agree to worh with the shrink to resolve all that needs to be dealt with. If this has happened before, even to a milder extent ( or if the shrink thinks it'd be useful ) then he should seriously consider giving up alcohol and joining AA to stay stopped.
"Sorry" is so easy to say ( some people can't even manage that !) but not so easy to do - and one needs to believe what they do more than what they just say.
Later I see you say this has happened before, which re-inforces what I have already said. Do not feel ashamed for what HE chose to do to you. You did not deserve it or cause it to happen. Don't take the responsibility away from him.
Consider seeing a group like POWA that specifically advises abused women, and consider exploring a longer-term escape and safety issues, and divorce. Like Chantelle, it is never healthy to allow anyone else to control your life in such a way - that is not, is never, love.
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