Our expert says:
Whew, tricky situation you are in Nella. It does seem that he has overstepped boundaries and this needs to be addressed. Whether or not he can overcome this may depend on his willingness to accept this behaviour as unacceptable and to seek professional help. You in the meantime are stuck not knowing how to manage the fact that females in your house cannot be assured privacy as there is a real chance that he might have found a way to spy again. Whilst it must feel asthough you don't know him at all, and this is a common reaction to discovering acts of deception/betrayal, you DO know major parts of him, and now know that you don't know ALL of him! You need to make it clear that this is unacceptable and perhaps support him to get help/seek some understanding of his behaviour. If he won't do this, then you have to make a decision based on a chance that this won't change vs. assuring your daughter/other women privacy.
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