Posted by: sphinx | 2008/08/18

Pathetic is not the word

So I know this might sound really pathetic, but I' m a young married female whose partner is 12yrs older than her with 2 kids, 1 aged 10yrs &  1 only 16months old. Staying with parents all shacked up in one room together. Finances not very good so not able to move out on our own (yet). I also earn double the amt he does so am mainly responsible for everything (or have made myself to be).
I think that I' ve fallen out of love with him as for the past few yrs have " found"  myself &  met someone who I relate to on all levels.
I' m still committed though but xtremely frustrated.

so that' s the short of it, but the thing is this: how do u expect to get ur freak on with a baby in ur bed (she' s recently moved into our bed), ur son in the same room not very far from u?? He made some comment about when I' m in the mood &  I said he' ll have to wait until the kids r out the room and he says " when will that be?" .

Now pls tell me, has he no plan to get out of the situation where we are or this like once again all up to me????????
I am so frustrated I just dont know what to do anymore, I really think that I' d be better off on my own. I can' t do anything without him, no girls night out, I can' t even go to the grocery store without him, he doesn' t want to pay his own bills without me and when we do go I can' t leave to run into another store quickly. I am tired!! What do I do??????

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Our expert says:
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See a personal counsellor firsrt of all to clarify your confusion about relationships and fair expectations, then see a marriage counsellor together. Its understandable that you feel sexually inhibited by the presence of the children in the same room --- can't your parents care for the kids sometimes, to let the pair of you have some privacy ?
The pair of you need to negotiate a fair distribution of chores and payments ( not fair for him to expect you to pay for everything --- what happens to his earnings ? ) But try earnestly to sort out these problems before deciding to leave, and don't start an affair, however fristrating this is. Is the other guy keen to take you on permanently, with both kids ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: What? | 2008/08/20

I mean honestly, being on your own would be better than being with this guy

Reply to What?
Posted by: what? | 2008/08/20

I can' t believe ' Uhm' s reply?! Any grass would be greener than what you' re currently grazing on girl?? Dump this loser and spend more time with that other person you mentioned who you " relate to on all levels" . You' re just staying with him cause you' re afraid of change. Believe me this will be the best move you' ve ever made!

Reply to what?
Posted by: abc | 2008/08/19

i would dump this guy, if he had any backbone he would have made a plan to earn more money or made other plans so that he can find a place of your own.

a hot blooded woman like you deserves a place of her own.

leave this useless excuse of a man.

women like you are very hard to come by, i would go to the ends of the world for a lady like you !!. most married women are dead in bed.

Reply to abc
Posted by: Uhm | 2008/08/18

I can believe that you' re frustrated, but NEVER EVER think that the grass is greener on the other side!!

Reply to Uhm

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