Our expert says:
Erectile problems may occur for a number of possible reasons, the most problematic of all could be serious health issues and so you need to have a physical check up - even though you have healthy erections during masturbation, it is worth excluding serious physcial problems (which could include cardiovascular difficulties)
If all is well on the physical front, it is likely that the difficulty is explained by a psychological block - e.g. fear of sexual failure/poor performance (e.g. losing erection, ejaculating too quickly, partner is not orgasmic or has pain during sex); anger at partner. Psychological factors like this essentially block the normal working of the sexual response and can be addressed through couple work with an experienced professional.
There are treatment options for ED - both pharmaceutical and psychosexual - why not consider some of these option together to see how this can be addressed. It is common that when one partner experiences sexual difficulty the overall intimacy in the relationship declines - this only makes matters worse (e.g. she gets angry with you when you try to 'use' your nocturnal erection when she is sleeping, or feelings of rejection/personalising your avoidance of intimacy)
As a first recommendation - have a physical check up by GP. If you gets the all clear, then you can be referred to a health professional with experience in this area or contact the South African Sexual Health Association Helpline on Tel 0860 100 262 for referral. .
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
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