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Question
Posted by: Iceblue | 2004/02/05

Oral sex tequneces

Hi there, please can any one tell me what is the best way to preform oral sex, i love doing it but i am not sure if i do it well, cus my gf says that she dosnt like it, please help i want to know if i am doing it wrong.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Get the right spots – Know your anatomy: Clitoris, Labia Minora, Labia Majora, Perineum, Mons Pubis.
Enjoy – There is nothing that will make her come faster than your enjoyment. Be sure to moan and tell her how much you're enjoying yourself.
Work out your tongue – Trace the alphabet on her clit with your tongue. Mouth L words, curl your tongue and slide it in and out.
Talk about it – Talk about what you both like and don't. Maybe discuss your favorite oral sex scene in an erotic video.
Get comfy – Find a place with no distractions where you will have time to explore. But oral sex can be great for a quickie too!

Tips for her to get what she wants:


Guided Tour - Have her use her fingers to demonstrate her preferred spot and motion.
Too Much, Too Soon - Don't stimulate too directly in the beginning. Some women new to the sensation are very sensitive. Work your way in to the clit by kissing and licking the inner thighs and vulva.
Pay Attention - If she is getting there and you make a move to come up – she should get assertive and let you know she's getting close to orgasm.
Every Woman is Different – What may have worked before, may not now. Hopefully she's communicating to you what she likes, just be sure you're following the directions to HER "Owner's Manual" and not someone else's.
Pubic Hair Trimming – It may help to identify anatomy as well as make it easier for you to access more of her.
Scent of a Woman – Perfumes should be used sparingly. It won’t taste better than she does. Regular hygiene should do the trick. Taking an erotic bath or shower together first can heighten the arousal. However, if there is an unnaturally bad smell it is probably a sign of infection.
Taste Test – Taste can vary according to variables such as diet and hormones. Each woman will have her own "brand." Learn to love it...become a connoisseur!
"Beavers are Gorgeous" – This is your opportunity to get up close and personal. Take in the beauty.


Technique - The Basics:

Use your whole mouth – Circle around the clit and suck gently, don't just flick. Get your whole mouth involved.

A Strong Tongue – Try 'em all and see what she responds to...
Firm dispersed pressure – In any direction on and around the clit.
Soft sloppy strokes – Side to side with lots of saliva.
Energetic flicking – Use this sparingly as a stiff tongue may be too hard on the sensitive clit.
Long prolonged strokes – From above her clit, down to her perineum.
Sucking – Try varying pressure and start lightly.
Circle the Clit - Lick underneath, on the shaft, around the hood.
Get a Rhythm – You won't need to go faster and faster. And don't change position when it's working! Rhythm is important.
Tongue Fatigue - Replace your tongue with a finger if you need a break.
Feedback - Keep going until you feel (hear) a response such as groaning, muscle tightening (thighs press to ears), arching of the back, and curling of toes.
Don't Rush – She will feel your urgency to come up for air. The biggest killer of pleasure.
Don't Stop - If you can feel her orgasm building.
Multiply Orgasmic – Some women are much more likely to have prolonged or many orgasms in a row with oral stimulation. Read her signs and keep going even beyond the first orgasm.

Positioning:


Sit back and Relax - Most couples begin with the woman sitting in a chair or on the bed. This gives full access to the genitals and support to the back so that the woman is relaxed and her hands are free to stimulate herself. The partner performing oral sex can lie or sit facing the woman, free to use his or her hands for stimulation with the fingers.
The Squat - The woman can squat on all fours or if strong enough just on her legs over her lover's face as she or he is lying down. If she is using her hands to stabilize herself, some prefer this position because it allows her to move her pelvis to accentuate the stimulation.
The "69" - This position also allows a couple to mutually stimulate one another when it is performed with each partner kneeling over one another at opposite ends. This position can be a bit trickier because it can be difficult to place your tongue right where you want it and it may be more challenging for either one of you to orgasm if you are focused on performing for the other person.
On "Her" Knees - She can kneel over you, facing forward and have more hip control.
Standing - Couples who wish to engage in playful dominance-submissive role playing might like to try standing while the other partner performs oral sex on his or her knees.

Advanced Tips:

Tongue Sex - Make your way away from the clit to the vagina.
Humming - It sends subtle vibrations through the whole area.
Dessert Anyone? - Eating sexy foods off of and out of her can really mix it up.
Mons Massage - The mons is the mound of skin which is found on top the pubic bone above the vaginal opening. Take one or both of your hands and carefully touch the mons and surrounding area much the same way you would massage someone's shoulders. Be careful with the amount of pressure and the broadness of your movements.
Add a Vibe - While licking your lover insert a vibrator or dildo into her vagina.
Breath Mints/Cough Drops - Have a mint or menthol drop in your mouth to give both her and you a refreshing tingle during oral sex.
G-Spot - Get a specially designed vibe to work on not only giving her a clitoral orgasm but a G-Spot one too. You can also use one or two fingers inserted about two inches into the vagina to rub the top wall.
Anal Play - Use your saliva as lube to rub and insert your fingers or butt toy into her anus.
Dental Dams - These are small latex sheets placed over the vulva to create a barrier to body fluids while performing oral sex. However, oral sex is considered to be a lower risk activity when it comes to HIV transmission.


The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: annie | 2004/02/05

Best thing you can do is contact Jonti Searle, who runs courses on masturbation, expanded orgasm etc. His stuff is really good. 083 743129. As for the oral stuff, follow what you will learn to do with your fingers with the tongue. In my opinion the tongue works much better as it is softer and warm.

Reply to annie
Posted by: iceblue | 2004/02/05

Thanks Wetwoman that helps :)

Reply to iceblue
Posted by: Wetwoman | 2004/02/05

I think the most important thing is that you TALK to her. Ask her what she'd like you to do, what makes her go wild. Maybe you are pressing/licking too hard, or too soft, every woman is different. So find out what she likes and do it!

Reply to Wetwoman
Posted by: Iceblue | 2004/02/05

Thanks you very much that dose help a lot, i will keep on trying and i realy wish she will like it, as much as i love doing it.

Reply to Iceblue
Posted by: wetwoman | 2004/02/05

You just play with your tongue, Iceblue.......flick it, lick her clit, suck gently, insert your tongue into her vagina...

Even better - insert a finger in her vagina and massage her g spot while sucking the clit, it will make her go crazy!

Maybe you are not doing anything wrong, maybe your girlfriend is self conscious about the taste/smell, etc. I had that problem but my boyfriend kept reassuring me that he loves doing it, and he kept on asking me whether I would let him do it......and when I let go of all my inhibitions, I started to LOVE oral.

Nowadays I want oral a lot of the times. SCREAMING orgasm, I promise you! When his rough beard lightly scratches my lips while he's licking me, it really drives me wild!

SO keep on trying, communicate with her, ask her why she's not enjoying it, maybe she just needs time.

Reply to wetwoman

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