Posted by: Dude | 2005/06/20

.. on the wagon

ey Doc ...

hope u well ... gettin in some rist action with that arm ...

my body is givin up doc ... my lungs r closin in ... been smokin so much of everythin... find that past the numbin sensation of killin lifes pain comes anger, misery and insaine ...

a hazy inbetween reality and another dream … or maybe a nightmare … should we bother bout it anymore cause that will has gone and no one seems 2 care … I honestly don’t care anymore … and y should I anyway … if I can make it through the day … without botherin bout life or anyone else … others problems and shyte … the little kids on the street corners beggin 4 money… if I don’t see them and don’t give 4 food in the tummy … if I can just forget about financial commitment and not worry bout where or when or how I’m going 2 receive the next shipment …

if my eyes filter out the shyte things they see, my ears stop hearin all the negativity … if all these back stabin mothers that point fingers at one another just fizzle out of existence like a disolvin disprin … will it make any difference …

if I take all the punches … … if I give it all away to the new princess that has come my way … do u think I would find happiness … when inside and alone I have always been happy and at one … till this life full of distractions begun …

and the forum … where people critic others when the forum is 4 those that cant cope with norm … where people bitch bout bein unattractive when they stuff there faces all day … havin hug asses that wont go away … where people cut themselves … where people abuse others … and themselves … is there any solitude found in expression of anger towards others … does it make them feel beta … silly mothers …

so anyway … I gotta start that clean out today … 4 I have the ability not 2 c what I don’t want 2 … I don’t have 2 hear the cries …t he phone ring at 3 in the morn from people that r desperate and want a foundation and some norm … I’m not norm … neva have been … norm is a thing defined by society and I have neva eva surfed that wave naturally … so the body is given up … no more smoking to avoid 6 feet under with any luck … and that’s weird 2 … when u don’t care anymore theres still a natural survival instinct keeping u breathin … what the fluck for ..


Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Well, Dude, I think you may still, just about, remember how to get by without the smoking, and your lungs will be grateful when you stop it ( remember, whatever you're smoking is bad for the lungs --- nothing one can smoke is good for them ). And maybe after some time spent smoke-free, you'll find it easier to recognize the answers to your "what for?" question.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Joanne E | 2005/06/20

At least we know our Max-dogs will always love us

Reply to Joanne E

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.