Posted by: Lady Nina | 2004/09/30

oh the drama.....

hi there

i'm sure most of you will give me flack for this posting but pls hear me out

i think it's selfish of someone to do a posting, letting us believe they are making an end to all.... i realize they are emotional at that moment and feel depressed but they leave and everyone gets really worried and can't consentrate on their work .... yet there is not much we can do.

sure i also got personally involved once - i phoned and emailed and lost some sleep - yet she is fine today ... not giving a thought of me being worried and concerned

at the top of this page is tel nr that can be called if things are reaaly out of control - there is help availible .... yet they post on this sight and leave .....

i think after what happened to ca we are all quike to respond and "see the signs"

i think very seldom do someone tell us they are going to end it and then go out and do it .... sorry but maybe i'm horrible but i just can't deal with all the drama... if they want to end it then do it but don't get the entire forum in a tizz

if a person who post on this site still feel unloved and unwelcome then the problem is not with the peopl of this forum - we all care about each other and want only the best - we are there to encourge and give advice .... but pls don't be so inconsiderate and selfish to make us all worry about you ..... for nothing

i know a lot of you will be upset with my posting and thats fine
i care about her and have shown my concern in the past, i don't understand her problems and i feel sorry for her but .... if you are in real turmoil pick up the phone and speak to someone - she does have some of the members nr or she can call the numbers at the top of the page .... their is help availible...

i feel it's selfish to do a posting and just leave the forum so the rest of us worry, do your posting and get it of your chest then pick up the phone and call the numbers availible, then get back to us and let us know you are ok

maybe i'm just to old for all the drama


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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

lady Nina,
I fully agree with your comments. While one can fully understand that we're not always fully rational when we're very distressed, it takes more thought, time, and work, to connect to this site correctly, compose and type a message, and post it here, than to pick up the phone and call an ambulance, doctor, family or friend. Although we care about everyone who posts here, and would all like to be helpful, its rather cruel to choose to call for help in a way that you know specifically prevents those you're addressing from actually being helpful to you. None of us need more examples of situations we greatly care about, in which we are made to feel helpless. We must encourage people to be responsible and take the appropriate steps to get the help they need. By all means talk with us here before a crisis, and after it. But, as I said in another responsec--- if your house or office is on fire, PLEASE call the fire brigade, and don't just post a message about it here on the forum.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Yum | 2004/10/01

I must agree with u LN. BT's posting seemed overly dramatic, especially considering that there was little anyone on the forum could do (other than those who were able to contact her). She was obviously aware of the consequences of what she was doing, distressed state of mind or not. I think the energy she put into writing her posting could have been put to better use by simply picking up the phone, not necessarily to call a help line, but to call any friend.

I can completely relate to being extremely distressed and overwhelmed, but BT's posting also seemed to have a measure of calculation to achieve a specific result: that everyone would be scrambling to somehow get to her before any real harm could be done. Could this be an example of the "attention-getting" that psychologists refer to when talking about suicide attempts?

I really hope that she is ok, and hope that anyone who is informed on the situation can keep us posted.

Reply to Yum
Posted by: MaPlotter | 2004/09/30

Couldn't agree more. Of course, it goes without saying that I sincerely hope that BT is alright but all this hoo-hah stretches the tolerance levels a bit. Seems to me that some people abuse this site, forgetting that it is intended to work as follows: person with problem posts and seeks help/clarity/explanation for condition (NOTE: cannot expect cure). Shrink responds as he does and points poster in right direction. Readers chip in with their contribution and all are happy.

However, it has reached a stage now where there is expectation of 24 hour interactive service and it would seem there are people wanting to push this along. A register with personal details has huge implications - both legal and logistical - and could even lead to an expectaion of heightened service delivery. For example, now that you have my cell number, I suppose I could log on at midnight and say I'm unstable enough to off myself and expect somebody to react and come running to my assistance. This is taking things much too far. In fact, CS himself has previously indicated that it is unreasonable to expect an reply from him within 24 hours every day.

H24 has gone to great lengths to publish emergency tel. numbers on this site. If people choose not to use the service in the only reasonable way, then it is unwise to even consider extending the service. The few individuals who are now doing the headless chicken dance may be infuriated by this but, I say again, this was never meant to be a walk-in service.

Reply to MaPlotter
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/09/30

You have all the right to feel the way you do Lady Nina. We all know what it means to feel helpless, we all know what it means to not know, & I'm sure we all know what it feels like to worry so much & have no answers. A lot of us are here because we always want to know the "whys" & the "howcomes", & we become desperate because we just don't know. At the same time though, even though we know all this, we just don't know how to just let it be & move on. & also, vivid past experiences makes it that much more difficult to move beyond a situation...
I don't fully agree with you, but I do understand the way you feel.


Reply to Shaun
Posted by: A | 2004/09/30

I cant get any work done - I am continuously checking for updates................damn

Reply to A
Posted by: Paul | 2004/09/30

I sortof agree with you LN.

Reply to Paul

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