Posted by: Babs | 2005/12/14

Not invited to friends wedding

I feel a bit hurt as I was not invited to my friends wedding. We have been good friends for over a year now and I have known her husband since he was a boy as he is one of my close friends brothers. I wouldn’t have minded if she had at least made some kind of excuse like they could only ask a certain amount of people but she didn’t say anything at all. I feel quite rejected and left out. Perhaps our friendship was not that important to her. We kept in touch a lot before this but now I don’t feel like bothering with the friendship as I am obviously not worthy enough to go to her wedding.

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Our expert says:
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Excellent responses all round, and I think :) has it right !

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Our users say:
Posted by: figured it out | 2005/12/14

There may be other reasons that you are not aware of.

Deubel has the best answer, send her a wedding gift, and congratulations. But do it with as much sincerity as possible, if you intimate that you are hurt at not being considered, you may find her withdrawing even more from you through guilt. By being nice and pretending not to have even thought about being invited, you give her the opportunity to redress the situation without feeling guilty or embarrased.

If you still dont get an invite, then be open about it, and tell her straight you would have really liked to be invited to the wedding to share this special event with someone you consider special.

Like I said, there may be other reasons why she has not invited you, maybe something to do with her husband.

Reply to figured it out
Posted by: :) | 2005/12/14

I found myself in the same situation as you are now in. At first I felt exactly as you do, then I remembered how tough it was chosing who got to attend my wedding. We were paying for it ourselves and already stretching our budget to the max so there were many people who I would have loved to share my day with me, but simply could not afford it.

I know its tough and we do tend to take things very personally, but please try not to see this as you being excluded because you are not worthy or special enough to her. If I were you, I would get her a really beautiful card and give her your sincerest best wishes.

As for me, hubby and I were so upset by the politics of this whole damn wedding ceremony affair and having to invite people we werent so fond of instead of the ones we really loved so we took off and sealed the deal in Mauritius.

My guess is that CaT is spot on the money.

Reply to :)
Posted by: CaT | 2005/12/14

maybe she hasnt said anything because she feels really bad about it and doesnt know how....

Reply to CaT
Posted by: Deubel | 2005/12/14

Never mind the invitation. Send her a wedding present anyway!

Reply to Deubel
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/12/14

When is the wedding? Maybe she is going to invite you personally.

Reply to Frusty

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