Our expert says:
I'm sure you're wise to decide to see counselling to work your way through this problem. Especially the first time one lets oneself become deply involved with another, one can readily built them ( and, even more outr idea of who and what they are, accurate or inaccurate ) so much into our way of viewing ourself and our world, that it becomes more than the loss of a person ( painful though that is ) and also requires us to re-jig our world-view, to form a new and stronger set of concepts of life, that don't include that person. In this way it's similar to other forms of grief. If one does the necessary job well enough, one can emerge stronger ; still capable of deep and satisfyin love, but no longer so vulnerable to being hurt by reverses of fortune within relationships.
I don't recommend specific shrinks / counsellors, for many good reasons, including the impossibility of anyone being able to know enough about all the thousands of such practitioners in this country, to be able to give reliable advice.
For relationship counselling, I have found the organization FAMSA often able to provide links to good and effective counsellors.
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