Posted by: Nna | 2004/10/21

No to child

Im a woman of 32 yrs dating a 38 year old man.He has a 14 year old child with another woman .The mother of the child is married.I don't have a child and i will love to have one and he says he is fine with the one he has.Money is not a factor at all i've got a good job and he is a well doing business man.But then he will tell you that a child needs time that we won't have much fun and time to ourselves and lots of money .I think he is being selfish.I not getting young i need /want a child.It makes me so miserable that i make excuses not to see him lately.And i love him and he cliams he loves me too.Whta to do really.

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like he's being selfish, and not seriously considering your feelings and wishes.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Lientjies | 2004/10/21

In a relationship BOTH parties should be happy. One should not be happy at the expense of the other's feelings.
Having a family is a HUGE decision, much more important than deciding whether you want to buy a puppy! It is absolutely life changing and your partner should feel the same way as you!
You only have 2 options and you need to decide very very soon - within the next year.
If you are content growing old without having children then stay with him.
If you want to be a wife, mother, and a grandmother one day then find a guy who also believes in the same family values as you and will be a husband a dad and a grandfather.
You are reaching the age where your fertility is becoming a problem. Doctors reckon that is a risk for a woman of 35+ to have her first child. So hurry up!!!

Reply to Lientjies
Posted by: S | 2004/10/21

Yes you are absolutely right, Marriage first and then the child.

Reply to S
Posted by: Anon | 2004/10/21

Maybe you should try getting married to him first.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: S | 2004/10/21

R u sure he is not still married?
Yes I am afraid the reality is that he sounds terribly selfish indeed. He has a child and as a woman you yearn to have a child of your own. You are not getting any younger and need to weigh up what is more important to you right now - a man or a child?
If he truly loves you surely he would want to have the most precious gift with you - a child.
You need to make some serious decisions Im afraid and its not going to be easy. But if you have this need for a child i am sure there is a man out there who you will make truly happy and he you.

Reply to S

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.