Posted by: vkdkskmk | 2009/03/22

No sex drive at all.....very depressed

I had a partial hysteroctomy in 2002, kept my ovaries but my sex drive and desire is gone. I found out in 2006 that my estrogen is very very low, my testosterone is non existent and my seretonen levels were 4 times the amount they should be. They put me on Premerian but I got a new job and now have no insurance and can not get my medicine.

What can I do, is there something over the counter that helps? Certain vitamens? Something? Anything?

I am so depressed and my husband told me that he feels like I am pushing him away, that I am not in love with him since I am not affectionate which depresses me even more.

I am 38 and this has been going on since my surgery, I can not act and fake it as that would be a lie and I am afraid I would start resenting my husband for pushing it on me.

Please anyone out there that can help me, I need someone to tell me what to do.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

I have two phases to my response: firstly, I don't know of anything 'over the counter' that could help, but I wonder if you were to post this message to the pharmacist on the Health 24 expert forum, maybe he could assist you there?

My second comment is that even if you don't find anything to help, it is possible to still 'drive' your response as long as you are able to feel aroused. I'm aware that a low level of estrogen might reduce your ability to lubricate, so perhaps you could priorise your spending on a vaginal estrogen cream? If you are able to become aroused (and don't forget that the use of lubricants can also assist here), and you have the 'wish' (in other words, 'interest' rather than 'hunger') for sex, then you could do what many, many other women do and drive their sexual response. This means that you learn that you don't always have to feel 'hungry' to have sex (we know this about food!), but that if you wish to, then you can initiate or be open to sexual stimulation. Be aware that starting from 'cold' means that you need longer to become aroused and will need to work harder to focus on your sensations. It could also be helpful to have more options available to you than always needing to have 'full on' sex in order to meet some of your husband's sexual needs. A food metaphor works well here...this is like saying: "I'm not hungry but I can (1) ask you to make yourself a sandwich and I'll sit with you while you eat (2) make a sandwich for you, (3) eat with you, and maybe I'll feel my hunger when I start eating)."

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Anonymous | 2009/05/12

There is an old adage that goes " if you put your husband in the dog house, you will soon find him in the cat house" . Try showing your man affection first. Maybe that helps.

Reply to Anonymous
Posted by: Bronwyn | 2009/04/24

Good Day

My marriage is falling apart because i have no desire to have sex AT ALL!!!! We married 8 years and have 3 children.

I do not feel pretty,special or desireable. I dont feel he shows enough affection towards me and if he does it is only to have sex. I feel that if i never have sex it will be to soon.

My husband has a high sex drive and if he could get it everyday he would be the happiest person. He begs me for sex and i just dont want it - i cant even handle him touching me down there.

Please help i really wanna be able to satisfy him as a wife and get rid of this frustration from of us.

Reply to Bronwyn

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