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Question
Posted by: Helena of Troy | 2005/11/29

Nicknames

Yesterday CP MOM was grinded again for calling a porra a porra.

She always calls him MY Porra, so please guys understand this and stop going at her in every posting. I also remember reading where she's said that him and his family don't find this word a problem and that he used it first.

It's just a nickname. My boyfriend calls me poplap and sometimes skoplap" depending on the moment and I am sure there are worse name I've sure heard a few.

Live and let live ? It's xmass time, let's try and be a little bit nicer to each other. The world is cruel enough out there, this is where we should be safe and be able to speak what's on our hearts.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I agree, this issue is so tired and worn out it deserves to be avoided. Everyone's point of view on it has been registered--- enough now !
I disagree with Parabola here --- some people spend their lives hunting for excuses to be outraged, and deserve to be ignored. If someone enjoys being called by whatever nickname, that's their prerogative. Others are entitled to be angry if that same nickname is applied to them knowing that they don't like it, but it's sheer interference in other people's lives to insist on being outraged by proxy, on behalf of people who are not themselves annoyed.
This is truly hypersensitivity, and not jusifiable.
And parabola goes way overboard in suggesting that everyone must avoid every word to which even one individual on earth takes exception. "So because there is ATLEAST ONE person taking offense, you should as an adult respect that, and refrain.". That's not ethics, and only someone lacking any understanding of ethiocs could think it was : that's dictatorship by the minority of one.
OK, what if I announce that I find the word Parabola deeply ofensive because I was once bitten by a geometry teacher, and indeed that I am profoundly offended by the words "and, but, the, I, and 3/4 of the current dictionary "-- should you all promptly stop using those words ? Of course not.
Even everything Parabola has said here could cause offense to some people, but it's reasonable enough so long as P's not expecting widespread obedience to P's wishes ) that it would not be banned. One would have to live an enormously privileged life to consider the occasional use of the P word as a disaster deserving all this fuss.
CP Mom, as a compromise and an act of graciousness, could you leave the dreaded P word out of the Subject lines of your postings, and refer to him as P when including a comment about him in your respinses on other people's quueries, while wording your own in the usual way ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Buzz | 2005/11/29

I agree with you Sue 2. This posting wasn't about defending CP Mom, it was more about stirring. Did it add any value? I certainly don't think so, it caused more damage to the person that was supposedly being protected.

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Sue 2 | 2005/11/29

Thank heavens I've been "off line" for 5 days!!!!! You guys have the knack to turn a simple post into a war!!! Grow up the lot of you........

PS. Hubby calls me "kakkapoo" it rymes with Sue.........and I dont have a prob.

Reply to Sue 2
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Fair enough CS, but the words 'the, and, I' etc are a part of English speech, and so claiming to be offended by one of them is just plain ridiculous.

But words like the P word exist in context to offend (as do most colloquel swear words and derogatory words).

So is it really ridiculous for me to not enjoy reading this word, and asking for people not to use it?

I think not.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Buzz | 2005/11/29

CS' response to your posting 11502 says it all.

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Buzz | 2005/11/29

Helena of Troy, why don't you follow through with what you said earlier today?

You said you're going to ignore the posts that make you angry, yet you didn't. In fact, you went as far as to start a brandnew posting - is this what you call ignore?

You also said you're going to be kinder to others. I certainly don't see it happening. You're calling Parabola a Para? Saying "you don't get it". Making statement that others are jealous.

Since when are you spokesperson for CP Mom. She's a perfectly intelligent, competent woman who can do her own fighting.

You are talking about nicknames, which is a form of endearment. I take it then that I'm very dear to you, referring to me as "dear girl". (Pssstt: it makes you sound ancient).

I'm sorry Helena of Troy, it's as clear as daylight. YOU ARE STIRRING, and you're doing CP Mom more harm than anything else.

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Cook | 2005/11/29

There is really bad stuff going on in the world and you all worry about a word, get a life. There is farm killings going on in South Africa, bom's going off in London, come on girls there is better stuff to talk about.

Reply to Cook
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

*Pathetic*

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/11/29

*click*

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

CP Mom, you didnt answer my question..
When someone seem to have a problem with one of your "special words", i.e. "click", and a debate arises from it, you do it more often.
Why do you enjoy stirring so much?

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

This is my normal nick.

I truly hope you can learn to respect others. It is truly an important trait for a healthy life, and can result in nothing else but good.

Maybe you should try it CP Mom? Or just continue on your track.

Either way, I don't really give a shit.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Tiekie | 2005/11/29

Wat kan ek se Parabollie ? Eks 'n dom afrikaner en reguit. Maar dit laaik jy nou seker ook nie, ag shame man.

Iemand wat soos jy tekere gaan is natuurlik anders kleurig en enige verwysing na iets wat iets met kleur te doen het sit jou af ?

Soos Lee gese het is enige van julle wat gepla is met die woord ooit portugees ?

Nee nes ek ook gedink het.

Reply to Tiekie
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/11/29

Tammy

I have used this word for over a year now and even CS has tried to explain to people like you it's my nic for my b/f, must I now call him something else just to make people like you and Parabola who can't use their normal nic's happy ?

Just skip my postings all together and rather use your enegry to read those postings in which you can actually be of help to somebody?

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: lee | 2005/11/29

Hmm... don't you think that ifyou get offended by every little thing in life (like a silly arrangement of letters) that we will miss out on the good stuff?

Reply to lee
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

And that Casey shows the nature of some of the users of this forum.

Pathetic really.

Tiekie, so you live life respecting no one else’s wishes or ethics? You don’t give a shit about other peoples feelings, even if they are strangers? Well then you are one cold, disturbed human being.

Show respect, and get respect. That’s the bottom line. If you don’t want respect from people, then that’s fine. It’s just no way to live.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: ... | 2005/11/29

Some of the "attackers" here have posted using their nics on this site.. Parabola posts regularly.... but I think you may be right about most others...

Reply to ...
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/29

What i found amazing, these idiotic fights & Trivial topics get so many responses outa your people, and the serious ones, get 2 or 3 responses.

Kinda proves the pettyness of people.

Maybe you guys should get busy with things that really matters in life. Things that can make a difference.
This is a clear waist of time & energy.

same fight every week. arguing in circles.....
people saying things that just make fools of themselves.

There are more important things in life people

Move on!!!



Reply to Delene
Posted by: ... | 2005/11/29

Is it not funny that when CP gets attacked not one name, that now being the attackers, are usual nics you see on this site.

Why are you people so scared to give your real names ? All of a sudden all these new nics appear.

Pathetic.

Reply to ...
Posted by: ... | 2005/11/29

HofT .... see what you started?? ..lol... the general sentiment you expressed has been lost....... the name calling has now started.... i thought that maybe this time it wouldn't reach the personal name calling stage..... but .. true to form.... everyone has risen to the occassion :)

Reply to ...
Posted by: Lee | 2005/11/29

Yes parabola... ive read it all... be senseless to leave out postings now wouldn't it...

Ok should i break it down for you?

Cp mom never responds to another posting using "the word that offends you" as her name. So if you see a response from her ignore it. As for her subject lines... just grin and bear it. (lol or bare it if you so wish).
Cp mom gives good advice. Why are you so offended by the word porra?

Or should I say "the word we do not speak of"? haha.. reminds me of the village

"the color we do not speak of" - if its red call it red. Calling it something else aint gonna change the color.

Reply to Lee
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

That was a question to you CP MOM...

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Hot | 2005/11/29

Portugeuese people from Madeira call the Portuguese form Portugal Porras as the americans have trailer trash.

The portugeuse people from Portugal call the ones from Madeira that.

As far as I know the word is only felt offensive by people who actually are the trash!

Reply to Hot
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

My apologies for being so bitchy in my last post, but really, you seem to derive pleasure in getting on other peoples nerves. You know for a fact that people dislike some of your terminology, but because it ticks other poeple off - you will do it more often.
Why do you enjoy stirring?

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Casey | 2005/11/29

I for one don't like the nickname CP Mom calls her boyfriend and would also NOT like to see it again. But then again everyone to their own. I agree with Tammy and Parabola, the word in itself is very offensive. I'm sure you can bet your bottom dollar, it'll be used MORE often than NOT now, especially after this debacle.

Reply to Casey
Posted by: Tiekie | 2005/11/29

Parabola

Like she lives for respect from you!!!!

Assefokkenblief!

Reply to Tiekie
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

Ditto that...
No wonder CP Mom has so many troubles in her relationships.
Porra...click - I mean how annoying can one person be?

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Lee,

Have you even read this entire thread.

Please read my postings AT THE TOP OF THE PAGE.

I would (and do) ignore her postings, but when the word is in the subject line or she responds to another posting using it, then what? I can't avoid it now can I?

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Lee | 2005/11/29

now who said cp mom was unpopular. As far as i can see she is well liked.

Ohh...nothing like a bit of a debate to make you feel alive :)

Reply to Lee
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Well CP Mom, that just shows your shelfish nature, and exaclty why you are so unpopular on this forum.

If that is then the case, you shall recieve no respect from me, as you do not respect my ethics.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Lee | 2005/11/29

oops... lol.. that post to parabola was from me... not from parabola to parabola

Reply to Lee
Posted by: Q | 2005/11/29

Yes.. CP mom it is fascinating... and so... it should be borne in mind that it is offensive for anyone who is not portuguese to call a portuguese person a "Porra"........ like your b/f.. he can call himself a "porra".... but you shouldn't! It's in bad taste really.......

Reply to Q
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Parabola - So what are you saying?... that because something offends you it should be stopped? oh shame.. poor you. News flash... the world doesn't revolve around you... get a grip. If you find it offensive ignore it as such. If you see a posting is from her... ignore it..

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Lee,

So just because I'm not black, I shouldn't take offense to the 'K' word?

Please think about what you are saying.

Again, it is not the point whether some Portugese people won't take offense, the point is THAT SOME PEOPLE DO TAKE OFFENSE, and the reasons for that ARE NON OF YOUR BUSINESS.

So because there is ATLEAST ONE person taking offense, you should as an adult respect that, and refrain.

Simple really.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/11/29

MY porra will stay MY porra, Parabola so live with it.

I will not call anybody else that in case is offends.

And the word nigger is not common in the USA it's commonly used by the blacks in the USA amongst themselves yet if a white person dare's call them that there is hell to pay!

LEE - I hear you girlfriend I hear you, hy's net so min gepla oor die woord porra as wat ek is om 'n boer genoem te word - as mens nou gepla wil wees hoe moet ek voel as ek iets doen en hy se "don't be afrikaans all your life" - genade dis al 'n joke in ons huis.

Ag jong as jy iets soek om iemand mee te slaan sal jy dit vind!

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: lee | 2005/11/29

here is a quote for all of you to consider:

God is a comedian playing to an audience to afraid to laugh"
Voltaire (1694-1778)

Reply to lee
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Hot are you talking to me?

If so, i cannot for the life of me see how i would be jealous of her... further more, i am not attacking her, i am attacking her use of THAT WORD. REALLY you only read what you want to.

CP Mom, just because the use of the word NIGGER has become ok in the USA, doesn't give you permission to use racial slurs on this public forum (when referring to 'him'), even if it is a nickname.

Let me reiterate - I AM NOT ATTACKING YOU CP MOM. I am asking you nicely to not use the word, as it offends me.

(Will not be surprised if this relatively simple point doesn't get through. *sigh*)

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Lee | 2005/11/29

What I find strange is that the people who are outraged are generally the people who it does not impact.

Parabola, tammy, - are you guys portuguese? Any person who is comfortable with who they are are not going to take offense. Neither my husband nor I take offence to being called boertjies (lol.. and i'm not even one)... just as I wouldn't take offence to being called a redneck or ëngelsman". I'm sure most portugues 'wouldn't object to being called porra - after all - its just a shortened form of the word.

Do any of you remember the nandos add where the dog ran the blind person into the pole cos it was after the chicken? :) the greatest outcry came from the people who weren't blind (the do-gooders on behalf of the blind). I'm sure if a blind person could see the add they would find it amusing.

People should learn to laugh at themselves. What a dull world we would live in if we couldn't.

Reply to Lee
Posted by: CP Mom | 2005/11/29

Dear Butterfly talking of the "K" word is it not facinating that the black Americans can call each other NIGGER over and over again but as soon as a white person does it's racist ?

Interesting.

Reply to CP Mom
Posted by: Hot | 2005/11/29

Once you get over your jealousy for this person you'll be able to think normally and see what pain there is and try and help with that in stead of finding a reason to attack her around each and every corner.

And another thing the only time you post under this name is when you are looking for trouble, why not use your normal nic?

Reply to Hot
Posted by: Butterfly | 2005/11/29

I have got to agree with Parabola here, just like having a black friend and calling them a "K" is extremly offensive and racist, maybe it would be a nickname, but it is stil OFFENSIVE.

Reply to Butterfly
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Get what exactly?

That you are completely not open to other peoples opinion, and will not under any circumstances take anyone else feelings into account but your own?

That you are selfish, and do not care about other users of this forum who find what you and your cronies post as offensive?

That just because you have decided in your own mind that something is right, then it is right for everyone else and no one can argue, no questions asked?

And that if someone does argue or raise a debate against your unjustified and non-lateral opinion, that person 'just doesn't get it', or just deserves your childishly obnoxious 'click'?

That you are not open to any suggestions or debates that just might be going against your opinion?

What don't i get exactly HoT?

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: HoT | 2005/11/29

Para you are just not going to get it are you ?

Oh well I tried.

Reply to HoT
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

No Tiekie,

It's fine to ignore her posts (which i do), but she also responds in other postings and uses it, NOT JUST HER OWN.

And as Tammy says, she puts in the subject line, so how can we avoid reading it then?

We are therefore forced to read it, where it be in her own postings or others.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

Dear Tiekie,
She puts the word in the subject line - which will obviously be read by posters, thus not even giving them a choice.
Bly maar liewer uit die fight uit as jy nie iets inteligent kan se nie, hoor?
Eks dom?? Sukkel jy maar met die engels?

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Tiekie | 2005/11/29

Tammy = hoekom lees jy dit dan oor en oor en oor, weet jy dan nie jy moet liewer nie haar posting lees nie ?

Ook maar lekker dom.

Reply to Tiekie
Posted by: Tammy | 2005/11/29

I agree with Parabola. Although she is referring to him as "her Porra", she is still using this word on a public forum. Fine, its a nickname that has personal meaning to her perhaps, so keep it like that - personal. We don't need to hear what she calls her man in her personal life. Why make us have to read it over and over again. Keep it between you and your partner (and his family, etc.).

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: Parabola | 2005/11/29

Although I do take your point, I must object.

Just because 'he' doesn't mind being called that, doesn't mean that OTHER people don't find THE WORD offensive.

I for one find the WIORD ITSELF offensive, and would prefer to not see it written anywhere, in exactly the same way as I don't like seeing someone getting mugged - it's not me getting mugged, but I still don't want to see it.

Just an opinion.

Reply to Parabola
Posted by: Jules | 2005/11/29

This so true....some people just have a issue over everything

Reply to Jules
Posted by: lee | 2005/11/29

hear hear!! I second that

Reply to lee
Posted by: Tiekie | 2005/11/29

Yebo ekke ook!

Reply to Tiekie
Posted by: Juzlisen | 2005/11/29

As long as the person being called that does not mind - why shoudl anyone else?
I agree - live and let live - its Xmas peeps.

Reply to Juzlisen

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