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Question
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

News of my daughter

I have been with Monique the entire weekend. It was VERY difficult to see her like that, some times it felt like I can just stand up and walk away, but I couldn’t I couldn’t leave my child.

Diagnoses: She have been traumatise by the fact that she was sexually abused and physically. Of course we know now that her boyfriend abused her physically, we are not sure who sexually abused my child. The blood she vomited was from internal bleeding as she was hit in the stomach.

We as parents are at the top of the list as possible ‘suspects’ but I don’t care, I know it was not me nor hubby. They may suspect us as much as they like. What we know is what makes the difference!

She did nothing but stare at the roof most of the times. The doc placed a mirror in her hand. She just held it, never lifted it up to look at herself. I talked to her like I always did. She never once looked at me. She didn’t sleep as well. She gets tube feeding as she has lost a great big deal of weight. She can not walk by herself.

I myself would love to get an hour or two’s rest, but I need to keep myself busy.

She is this fine petite 48kg girl. Not anorexic thin, petite. Why would anyone hurt her?

I have lost a child once in my life, I am NOT prepared to loose one again!

Thanx for allowing me to blow off some steam here! You are all great inspiration to me.

Riana

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Thanks for the follow-up, Riana. So sorry to hear confirmation that your daughter has been abused, which is what I suspected ; but of course she's far safer now that this is recognized. It's upsetting for you, but natural, that mother and father and other family members would be amongst those suspected --- because obviously most people are abused by someone they know and who has easy access to them. If it is confirmed that the boy-friend actually assaulted her, in due course, he can be charged with assault, and she could also get a court order forbidding him to come anywhere near her ever again.
It may be that somehow she expected both you and your hubby to protect her against this boy, or whoever else may have abused her, and be scared to tust you again, for fear that she won't be protected again.
I hope her treatment proves successful.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Libby | 2006/07/24

Sorry advise given by Me and Buzz did not see the above posting just now.
Good luck

Reply to Libby
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Thank you, i will

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Libby | 2006/07/24

Hi Riana

Was thinking pf you and your family all weekend and I am shocked to hear what the doctors came up with. She must of been so scared and traumatised by all this happening to her.

Be strong and remember although it does not look like she is aware of your presents at the moment I am sure that she knows that you are there.

Be strong take one step at a time. you are going to need more than just strenght you are also going to need patience to deal with this whole matte.

Please thake the advise given to you by Buzz as I would of done the same. You have to report the matter the longer you wait the worst it can get.

Regards
Libby

Reply to Libby
Posted by: Me | 2006/07/24

You can do something about the abuse. You need to get the medical report which confirms the physical and sexual abuse. take it to the police, and they can investigate. they can interview the hospital, to see who has had access to your daughter, you and hubby and also the bf himself. this is serious and something needs to be done about it...

Reply to Me
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Its hard to be strong, but im doing my best!

Thanx!

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Buzz | 2006/07/24

Riana, you need to get a letter from the doctor who examined her, in which it states/confirms that Monique was raped. Then you need to report it to the police asap. Although the police will not be allowed to question Monique at this stage, they can however interview you and your husband to find out whom she was in contact with during the last couple of days. There is no other way, you have to do this in order to save this criminal's next victim!

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Liz123 | 2006/07/24

Thinking of you in this time Riana. Be strong

Reply to Liz123
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Than you.

Buzz i cant do anything now can i? I need her to tell us waht happened. i can not go and accuse Jason of things without proof.

I think it was him. it can only be him.

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Tango | 2006/07/24

Riana I am thinking of you all. My heart goes out to your child, she must have been to hell and back. Also keeping you all in my prayers.

Reply to Tango
Posted by: Buzz | 2006/07/24

What are you going to do about it Riana?

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

I cant help wondering if this was her boyfriend who did it. He came to visit us every day, and becuse i trusted them i sometimes left them alone when i had to go somewhere.

Im sorry i did that.

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Buzz | 2006/07/24

Then this must have happened recently! Do you have any idea who might have done this to her Riana?

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

BUzz, they did a medical test and it showed that she was raped or had sex with force. as she had internal bleeding and some of her intestines were torn apart.

this normally dont happen if you have sex unless it was forced.

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Dankie Mia!

Baie baie dankie!

Riana

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Buzz | 2006/07/24

Riana, how did you find out that Monique was sexually abused? Did she tell the psychiatrist?

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Mia | 2006/07/24

Hi Riana

Ek volg jou storie van die begin af, en my hart gaan uit na jou, hubby en jou dogter....wonder net watse wrede mens kan dit aan jou dogter doen, hy moes iets verskrikliks aan haar gedoen het om haar soos n Zombie te gemaak het....

Ek dink aan julle, ek hoop dat daai vark wat dit gedoen het sy dae sal kry, ek glo dit.
Ek hou duim vas vir julle en sit my gebede ook in.....

Mia

Reply to Mia
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Thank you very much!

It really helps!

Reply to Riana
Posted by: Brroklyn | 2006/07/24

You and your fam are in my thoughts and prayers - keep strong, God will get all you through this.

Reply to Brroklyn

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