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Posted by: Samantha! | 2004/11/07

Neglect after Abortion!

i left my boyfriend after i had an abortion.because he wasnt there for me afterwards which really hurt me,we go to the same school and i'n thinking of telling the administration about the situation.do woman have rights when men take no responsibility for their actions.i didnt even have much time to decide whether i should keep the child or not.he woulnt even think or want to hear anything about it.i just want to know if i have rights in this case and i need medical care should he help pay for this or does he just walk away a free man after this i went through the physical pain.now still emotional and the fact that i was neglected.what should i do.telll on him so he can get expelled,i dont care cos im leaving thecollege anyway,should i get someone to let his mother know.or should i just let it go which i dont want to do?does he according to the law at least have to support me somehow?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi Samantha,

it is awful that you have had to shoulder all of these things on your own, but unfortuanately there is very little you can do at this stage. He would have legal responsibilities if the child had been born to help support the baby.

As sad as it is the best thing you can do is to walk away from the situation and him, as although revenge may make you feel better briefly it is not going to take your emotional pain away.

In future, your best bet is to protect yourself by using the contraceptive pill and to insist on your partner using a condom.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Samantha | 2004/11/08

Thanks for your support i really appreciate it.Im going for counselling soon,hopefully i'll be able to sort things out.i've left the bastard,still see him around but even look at him.Thanks this is a learning experience for me and i just hope other girls get to read these things and learn from it to.It can happen to anyone.

Reply to Samantha
Posted by: ouch | 2004/11/08

Girl you have gone through alot - having an abortion has a huge impact on your life and will stay will you forever...
you really need to seek some counsiling as this can seriously damage you...esp one day when you are already married and purhaps expecting a child.... PLS you owe it to yourself!

And really you are so young to be having sex let alone abortions... unless with your husband one day ther are many scarey things linked here honey...falling pregnant agian & HIV (people always lie about who they have slept with) I can happen... Dont be in such a rush , your body is precious , dont let boys get to you ...just so that they can"relieve thier sexual tension it not fair for you or what could happen.

Be careful and go seek help as maybe not now but later on you could get depression ect ...abortion is KILLING a life its not something to have a move one with life without help.

Forget this boy he isnt worht thinking about move on and leave what happend behind you ...I hope you have learnt sex outside of marriage will not lead to any benifits .

Reply to ouch
Posted by: blink | 2004/11/08

There is no law that can force a man to support you, either before or after having an abortion. That is one of the sad facts about abortion that nobody ever discuss or think about.

My personal opinion - if he is lousy enough to neglect you after your abortion, he is not worth hanging on to anyway.

I know this is not what you want to hear at this stage, and I can only imagine how much pain this is causing you, but why not make a clean break and leave all the heartache behind?

Reply to blink

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