Posted by: Distraught Man | 2013/02/21

Negative Partner

My fiancé  has a tendency of negativism. Everytime things don’ t go her way she also always threatens to cheat. Her friend is currently on a cheating spree and she is proud of it. However, she also accuses me of cheating, going through my phone, expect me to account to her about who I communicate with. Is this normal? Should I think she is cheating as well? Our sexual life has become a mission as well, dropped because she uses it to settle the score in our fights, I’ m at the point where I think she might be sleeping with someone. Please advise.

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Our expert says:
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If she feels justified in threatening to cheat on you as a punishment any time she doesn't get what she wants, she is childish, vindictive and irresponsible. If she feels proud of her friend cheating, that's a further very large warning to you. Why are you choosing to remain engaged to a person like this ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Observer | 2013/02/22

Find a way to work together with her. people cant always advise you to leave a person at the first complaint.

maybe there is something that you are also not doing right or she is just a negative person.

and yes you can spend the rest of your life with such a person. it just depends if you love her you will do whatever it takes to help her. if you have tried every book in space and it doesnt work then you can say you have failed.

maybe its better if we all tell you to be positive than be negative like her.

Reply to Observer
Posted by: Purple | 2013/02/21

Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone who behaves like this?

Reply to Purple
Posted by: Jenna | 2013/02/21

Just a question, has she started acting like this since she found out her friend was cheating, or has she always been like this?

It''s possible that her friend cheating (and the fact that she is proud of it) has made her feel insecure in the relationship, but unless you have actually given her reason to think otherwise then it''s not normal.

It could be possible that she is also cheating, but to get any attention off her she fights with you and makes you the baddie.

Reply to Jenna
Posted by: Anon | 2013/02/21

Not normal at all, I hope you guys haven''t made actual wedding plans yet, getting married without there being basic trust would be a very bad idea!
I agree with just me, it shouldn''t be so much work, the snooping around, constant questioning and wondering...none of it is normal or healthy. Threatening to cheat on you and using sex as a tool, shows great immaturity.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Just Me | 2013/02/21

''A tendency of negatism" .... I would prefer to say she''s needing help big time! Relationships should be easy...NOT constant hard work! Yours is definitely hard work and NOT normal. Time to sort things out...or move on. Marrying an insure woman who has already started such bizaar behaviour....nah, not a good idea.

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