Our expert says:
Tell the facility that you hold no grudge against your mom, but can't afford to visit her, either emotionally nor financially, and are in urgent need of therapy for yourself, which you can't afford. Maybe an arrangement can be made for you to get the therapy you need through a state / provincial facility. Of course you're not a bad person, and damaging yourself won't help your mother either. Continue with your ownn good work towards healing yourself, and maybe work harder towards finding a source for some form of affordable therapy for you. Once you're stronger and better, you can then be available to make some mild contact with your mother if you wish to do so
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