Posted by: Mimi | 2008/05/21

Need Help!

My husband's mom past away a year ago & he became very distant and rebellious towards me. I gave him his distance for a while but then we started arguing & he constantly left me home alone. I used to feel bad and put all the blame on me for causing the fight thinking i was being an unsupportive wife. 2 weeks ago I find out that my husband has been phoning a friend of mine everyday for the past nine months behind my back. I confronted her she said he phoned her a few times but when i pulled out his phone records it shows her number dialled several times a day from his phone. However my husband has begged for forgiveness and we still together. She lives with her parents up my road & when i see her or think bout what they were doing behind my back, i feel like being violent towards her but instead i become depressed & cry & become distant from my husband which eventually turns into bickering. It becomes nasty and i eventually want to leave. I cry so much and i feel like im going insane. My husband trys his best to cheer me up but inside me i just wish he were dead. What is wrong with me?

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Our expert says:
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Calling her several times a day is a lot more than just being occasionally comforted in one's grief by a friend. WHy not see a marriage counsellor with your husband --- not necessarily to glue the relationship back together, but to see what might be fixable, and at least to each be in a better position to decide what next would be best for both of you

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: David | 2008/05/21

You haven't forgiven him yet, he betrayed your trust and your love for him and he has now created trust issues with you and in your marriage that's why you still feel so helpless, violent and sad, he cheated on you, whether emotionally or physically it's still the same and you have every right to feel the way you do. But, please understand you are not to blame for this, try and forgive him, go for relationship councilling and most of all cut this woman out of your lives all together and tell him that if you ever see her number on his phone again for ANY reason you will file for divorce.
Go and see a phsycologist for yourself, to help you to come to terms with what has happened and to be able to move on and put it behind you and learn how to work on restoring your marriage if you feel it is worth the effort in the long run.

Good luck sweetie!

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