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Question
Posted by: desperate | 2003/12/18

my unborn child

I wrote in earlier about my fall out with my boyfriend. I just need someone to talk to.
I am not a person that ever took crap from any man, and even though I know I shouldn't here either - it is hard, ever since I found out that I was pregnant I put my needs and feelings aside I dont know if I am obsessing but it seems like everything in my life has become about this baby, also that being the reason why I did not tell him to go to hell and get out of my life when I found out about him and the ex - I am stupid know - but can anyone understand that I dont want to bring my baby into this world without it's father? I am stressing so much I cannot eat or sleep it has been like this for nearly a week now. When he left he seemed so angry towards me like he hated me or something. He is a good man - always took care of my emotional needs - if I ever needed anything he would take care of me. Since we found out we were pregnant - I was the one who had a hard time accepting it and he was more supportive. But now I feel like I want to die. This is hurting me so bad. I do not know how to deal with it. I am constantly in tears, I keep checking my phone to see if he has called, I am a total wreck, my mom said that if I dont stop stressing I am going to miscarry. That is the last thing I want. Look I am not looking for pity or anything like that - I can take it if he feels he no longer wants me that is fine over time I can learn to deal with that but this baby is a part of him too. Is it so wrong to want him to be a part of his child's life? I dont know what went so bad that he has now changed his mind about wanting the baby, when before I was unsure. Please I feel like I am losing my marbles. Should I go see someone about this?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

dear desp.
You're describing extremely normal reactions, both to a pregnancy, and to a rift in a relationship. Yes, this degree of stress and lack of food and sleep, isn't good for you or the baby, and you do seem to be focussing excessively on the man, rather than your needs and those of the baby. Yes, it would be a most excellent idea for you to see a counsellor as soon as possible, to help work through your feelings and decisions, to have someone to talk with in depth, and to calm down somewhat. Can't your Mom or some mutual friend contact him, let him know how desperate you have become, and find out what's happening with him ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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