Our expert says:
You know, she can Tell you. all she wants to. But it's up to you whether you listen, let alone accept and follow her advice. I'm nor surprised it annoys your hubby. And what makes your mom so amazingly brilliant that she knows your husband will ruin your life, but that she won't ? There's nothing at all wrong with you criticizing her, But you are giving her WAY too much power over you. Lead your own life, with the husband you have chosen, and ignore her advice, whether or not it might be well-meant. And if you really find you can't , see a counsellor to get over this block.
If she won't let go, then YOU let go --- the rope can only pull you if you hold on to it at this end. When she gives instructions, just smile and say "Mmm, that's interesting. I'll think about it" and ignore it. make you own mind up.
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