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Question
Posted by: dead | 2007/07/11

my life is over

since being diagnosed with cancer of the liver i feel as though i am dead already. i go to work then go home and go straight to bed
i dont watch tv, read or socialise, i just go to bed and cover myself up with a blanket and thats all i do. weekends are much the same. when i was first diagnosed i used to get phone calls from friends and relatives but those have stopped. i went to see a psychologist who said i should go to a butcher and look at the liver all red and heklthy and thats how i should see mine, all healthy, in other words a healthy mind = a healthy body. I am really tired all the chemo has made me tired and weak. i pray for death to come and soon

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I am so sorry to hear of yoru difficult situation, d. And I can't help feeling that the ppsychologist who sent you to the butchers ought to have his/her head examined by someone with proper knowledge of how to be helpful.
But there should still be some good liing to do. Chemo is beastly, there's no hiding that, and it takes a lot out of you. I know from my own more limited experience of more limited chemo, that far beyond side-effects, it really is exhausting, physically and emotionally. But it could prove helpful and be a whrthwhile investment of your courage. Counselling should be helpful, if you can find a shrink who is realistic rather than gruesome and naive --- the Cancer Association should be able to link you to other cancer surivors who have experienced this sort of chemo and can be helpful based on their own real experience, and should also be able to steer you to a less surreal and silly shrink. You deserve more than simplistic Positive Thinking ideas, and can be more an active part of the strugle against your cancer, and more able to find peace and comfort while alive and moving forwards.
Friends and family with most illnesses, can provide more attention that you need at first, and then drop of as one continues dealing with one's illness, and usually just when their attention and help would be more needed.
Part of the problem is that, knowing that you are facing a serious illness, they feel uncomfortable and don't know what to say to you. Some feel that they need to find some miraculously brilliant things to say to make you feel entirely happy, and, not being capable of thinking of such words, avoid you, uneasy at not being able to bring you the degree of comfort they think you need and deserve. If only they'd realize that what one generally needs and wants is far simpler, some company, some support and encouragement.
Do see a properly skilled shrink ; do contact the Cancer Association and se ehow they can help ; and do remain in contact with us here on this Forum, as we'd like to maintain contact with you and hear of the ups and downs of your progress.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Oprah | 2007/07/11

dead- u can survive this ... read the book of Lance Armstrong - It's not about the bike ... I finished reading it about 2 months ago n it was a real eye opener 2 me .... u will neva believe what positive thinking can acchieve. It wont always b sunshine n roses but as long as u get back up on u'r feet n decide 2 fight back - u will cum out of it victoriously.

Read da book - he sounded just like u untill he decided to fight back positively

Sunflower - for 1ce I agree with u - real gud advice!

Reply to Oprah
Posted by: Anon | 2007/07/11

I am praying for you if that is any comfort.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: sunflower | 2007/07/11

the shrink was right, don't give up. I read an article in Fair Lady once where they said HIV positive people that have a positive mindset recover or bounce back while they are on medication and those who give up don't improve or are more likely not to imrpove. please don't give up.

there are resources out there, join a support group, or go and read some literature. there are quite a few books written by survivors of cancer. You just need to want to heal and believe that you will and that will be half the battle. conventional medical treatment is not enough.

Reply to sunflower
Posted by: Paul | 2007/07/11

Hello,

I dont know what to say to you.

You are in my prayers.

Paul.

Reply to Paul

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