Our expert says:
Doesn't it make good sense for BOTH of you, to go and see the doc when either of you have an acute illness like a touch of bronchitis ? And with flu, where there's no added bacterial infection, simple over-the-counter remedies probably help as much as anything can, unless the illness becomes prolonged and complicated.
I'm sure you don't enjoy being "miserable moody and sick" and it cant be any fun for him, either.
Some people, maybe especially men, just aren't comfortable or skilled at caring for sick people.
But if you are sick and need help from him, ASK, don't wait for him to volunteer. Again, some folks are awful at recognizing where they might be helpful, and at offering their help.
Maybe indeed he would benefit from seeing a shrink, but in the shrink's world you can't even lead the horse to water, let alone make them drink - the guy has to recognize that he has problems and needs help, and WANT to get the help.
Maybe its nmot helpful to let him be so negative and passive - make it clear you can't handle all the household and family chores, and that he must now start taking on some of these himself. TO encourage him to do so, without being overtly unpleasant about it, delay the chores he wants most ( like making his support ) until really late, while you get on with everything else. When he grumbles, say, well, if you could help by doing X and Y, I'd get fin9shed sooner and we could enjoy supper earlier.
If he means what he says about how he'll Do It Himself, take him at his word - do the family washing, but not his. What happens when you do Leave him alone as he asks ?
Have you tried ignoring his bad mooeds, and praising him for his good moods, to encourage those ?
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