Our expert says:
Aloha mahalo, and namaste,
Pity your husband has never grown up. I see no problem whatever in any man remaining fond of and involved with his mother --- but for a married man to visit her 6 times a week is a bit over the top. OK, so there's presumably a good reason for him to take her home after her and his work, though maybe it's simply convvenient for her no to look at any other alternatives for transport, like doing it herself. Sounds like she's happy to spend on her pleasures and past-times. If she CAN drive, she needs to stay in practice. What would she do it your husband was injured or unavailable ?
Sounds like you were appropriately assertive ( rather than aggressive ) and the ultimatum to her makes good sense ( thougn whether he will actually follow through on it if she doesn't do what is required, one waits to see ).
YWhy do you feel bad ? Good question. Maybe because both of them have taught you to feel bad ? Maybe you grew up to feel that it was somehow bad for you to assert yourself and to be active in getting something you really needed, rather than just meeting other people's needs before your own.
If what you did made you a wicked witch, we need more such witches around. Mazeltov !
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