Our expert says:
yes, accepting back the unrepentent err-er encourages them to err again. He does indeed sound awfully childish, and of course, like all old children, he resents the very suggestion.
What is unforgiveable, though is for him to take out on the child, in any way, his petulance or difficulties with you. Thats hostage-taking, not parenting.
You can stop your relationship with him ( it doesn't sound as though he has a consistent of fruitful relationship with the child ) - but that's no reason to break the apparently pleasant relationship between the child and the grandmother.
I really don't see any necessary link. You an the child can continue to see his mother, and so what if she tells him the child is well ? It's about not allowing HIM to crawl back into your personal life.
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