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Question
Posted by: PrettyK | 2003/03/17

My bfs family friend

Problems, I have a boyriend who always complains about my behaviour. Recently he told me that before he met me he had a secret affair with this woman who is a family friend, her parents and my bf's parents are friends. When that woman is around I used to see as if there's something going on with her, but my bf never said anything until recently. Where he told me that they've kissed and what not. I was soo furious mainly bcoz I've asked him several times and he never said anything, I said awfull things about them both.

Now I don't know how to behave around this woman anymore, and she's his sisters friend and she's always at my bf's house. For the last three times when I came into contact with her it feels strange, she always greet me wiith a long face now that my bf proposed. My bf told me to treat her as normall because what happened between them happened before my time. I feel I am treating her as normal but now when I tell my bf that the woman greet me with a long face as if she's forced, he blames ne for it, he says I might be causing her to greet me like that because of my behaviour. He doesn't even believe me and he told me if anything bad can happen btn this woman and I he's gona hold me responsible. This is really breaking my heart and I don't know how to deal with the situation

Please advise?


Regards

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Our expert says:
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PrettyK,
What he did before he met you is hardly much of your business, is it ? What brilliant fortune-teller told him that he had to avoid knowing or kissing any woman until he met you ? You will, surely, destroy this relationship if you insist on obsessing about tings that happened, or even didn't happen, before you knew him. The past has passed ; leave it be. What's important is if you can be big enough and adult enough to live in the present and work for the future, without tripping up because you keep looking over your shoulder ( and his shoulder ! ).

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