Our expert says:
Gosh, what a complex situation ! After 13 years ( you'd need to check with a lawyer ) I'd thinkany claims or rights he might imagine he has, would have lapsed, and of course he has no right to just suddenly turn up an expect an immediate visit.
When you say you dread him "poisoning" G, I assume you mean mind-poisoning by saying nasty things ? IF he tries that, he can simply be asked to leave immediately, and G who has known you for so long, especially if you prime him with information about this guy's past history with his wives, is unlikely to take any such nasty comments seriously.
And mom may well be right here - if he has shown so little interest in his own child, he's unlikely to have any genuine interest in an adopted child - maybe h just wants to snoop around and see how you're doing. Maybe arrange to meet him at a coffee-shop so as to reveal less.
But overall, I agree with Maria - why meet with him at all ? Why indulge his nosiness. Let him go and duik other dams !
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