Our expert says:
As you recognize, there's a difference between keeping the peace and being polite and even cordial, and "having a good relationship and being pals. However, it's been only a month, and surely it's understandable and acceptable that your husband feels it necessary to spend more time with his mother --- you don't know the depths of how he feels about the death of his father, or how she feels.
Some MIL's are nasty, some are not. I can't see anything wrong at all in what she is doing, from your decription, nor in what he is doing. Be patient and understanding of grief and bereavement
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