Our expert says:
HMm, awkward. Sounds like she may have felt desperate about the divorce, and was scared of finding herself out on the street ? But if she is to stay with you you must speak firmly but plesantly and make it clear that so long as she stays in your place and at your expense ( and you can ill afford it ) she must work by YOUR rules - and you and your kids watch whatever you wish on YOUR TV. And you do not pay for lunch for a friend of hers at work. If she's going to work still, she must have an income, and could surely afford more than R300 a month towards expenses ? And she should see a lawyer to see if she can claim any controbution from her husband.
And tell her in advance, that you will not be distracted or change your mind if she complains of a pain in her heart. What have the doctors said about her heart ?
And tell her if she chooses to lie in bed complaining of being "sick" but without a doctor's certificate, this is the equivalent of her going on strike, and is not acceptable. You will not allow her to ignore what she is imposing on you.
At 69 and with a gulltime job, she CAN aford to get a place of her own - maybe she can share with the friend at work she takes lunch to.
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