Our expert says:
Most irritable people do seem to expec the privilege of their irritability, but not to extend this privilege to others --- they don't see you as having any comparable right to be irritated. Ignoring can help, unless that also irritates him ! Sometimes merely murmering "THat's awful, dear, isn't it?" helps. YOu identified a key factor in your observation that his mom also does this --- that's where he learned this pattern of behaviour, probably without even realizing that he has done so. And you hav noticed how the rest of the family has learned to handle this.
Its sad that someone like this so often won't go for counselling, as they are afraid to acknowledge that they have any need for it. Maybe other readers, from their own experience, may have some suggestions
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